Introvert Tactics

I watched the following video the other day and he makes some excellent points in it. Let me go through them:

First of all, being introvert has nothing to do with being shy. Actually in the video he gives an excellent example about how introverts roll. He says that he will be in a club and then after a couple of hours he'd wish that he was back home on the couch watching a movie or something similar which is Introvert 101.

Also, what does being an introvert have to do with social anxiety. Remember it is about how you recharge yourself not whether you crumble in the front of other people. Although in saying that, some people are going to struggle

Lets go through the five pieces of advice in this video:

1. Nervous Reframe

This is an excellent piece of advice. You are not nervous about what is going to happen but you are excited about what is going to happen.

In this video, a lot of his examples are about pick up and talking to women, so the example would be rather than being nervous that you might look stupid and get made fun of, you are excited that you are going to meet someone great and you might go out on a date with them later.


2. Utilise your Passion

I like this one a lot and I say this in my blog as well. When someone asks you "What do you do?' they are mostly waiting for you to say your job title and preferably in language that they can understand. However, when you start talking about your passion then you become excited and you will become a more interesting person and people will ask you more questions and it snowballs from there.


3. Make it Certain

What holds us back is uncertainty and because we don't know what is going to happen we don't want to do anything. But if you prepare and you have a plan of attack then in your mind you are going to be more calm and whatever happens you knew it was going to happen.



4. Initiate Always

In my opinion this is the best piece of advice in the video. Always take the lead. If you are a man and you see a woman that you want to talk to, go over and say hi and remember you don't need any fancy pick up line like "I've lost my phone number. Can I borrow yours?" That's just cheesy.

If you see someone you haven't seen for a long time, go over and say hi. You don't have to spend the next three days and three nights with them, just say hi and talk for a couple of minutes and say bye. I assure you the other person will be happy that you made the effort to initiate it and if they aren't, what did you do? You went and said hi. What a monster you are! (That's sarcasm.)


5. Stay Mysterious 

I must admit that I don't really get this one but I suppose if you focus your attention on the other person, then you are not going to be talking too much and the other person would be happy because you are talking about them and then they realise that you haven't said anything and that would make them realise that they don't know you at all.


In summary:

• Make it exciting
• Talk about your passion
• Certainty
• Initiate
• Mysterious

Excellent video. Take a look if you haven't already.

IS IT THE BEAUTIFUL GAME?

There is no doubt that football (soccer) is the sport of the masses, the most popular sport in the world. There is no argument about that.

The excitement, the passion of the players and the supporters, the last minute goals to win or draw the game:

It's all there and it can be fantastic sporting theatre. However like any theatre there is always a villain and that villain is the constant running at the referees, shouting and gesticulating. The diving and the simulating, I think it ruins it all.

This afternoon I was watching the final game of the J League season. FC Tokyo had to beat Yokohama Marinos by four goals to become champions. In the end Yokohama won quite easily 3-0 and became champions for the first time in 15 years but what struck em about the game was midway through the second half when the FC Tokyo striker Kensuke Nagai was going for goal and was fouled  by the Yokohama keeper. Whether it should be a yellow card or a red card was debated and needed with people running at the referee and his assistant and it just got tiresome.

For me what was a great spectacle was ruined by the antics of the players.

I think that referees should be more fearless in giving cards for that kind of shenanigans. Also yellow cards should be like rugby and be a 10 minute sin bin.

I would like to know what football fans think of my 10 minute sin bin thoughts.

Situational Extrovert Gets Out of His Comfort Zone

Part of the Situational Extrovert experience is about getting out there and doing new things.

Over the years I have tried things that people have given me grief for. For example, I went to a salsa class a few times. I was completely useless. I had two left feet if you now what  mean.

I went to a couple of guitar lessons. These lessons were about as successful as the salsa ones.

I even would do something first that other people were scared to do. I remember when I was at school and we had a fundraising hole in one competition on the field. I arrived at school early on that day and decided to have a go. None of my other friends wanted to step up so I did. It was a total disaster. The ball hit the side and made a huge noise but not as loud as the laughter coming from behind me.

Of course at the time it was a touch embarrassing but when I look back on it, I was proud of myself for getting out there and having a go before anyone else.

That is what the Situational Extrovert is all about. Getting out of your comfort zone for a short time. Stretching yourself.

What are you going to do this week to get yourself out of comfort zone? To expand your world.

ENGAGING WITH SERVICE STAFF

Do you engage with sales staff or shop staff or servers in a restaurant?

As a situational extrovert I suggest you do exactly that from time to time. It will help you build situational extrovert confidence and I'm sure that it will make their day.

You don't have to do it every time because that will tire you out, believe me.

Do it once in a while but make sure that it is relevant and real not some made up banter you had written the night before.

ENGAGE, ENGAGE, ENGAGE and tell me how it went.

Good luck.

TINDER etc

Hands up if you have never heard of Tinder?

Tinder is almost synonymous with dating in 2019. Every single person seems to have it on their phone and people swiping by the millions every day.

As a situational extrovert, sometimes it can be difficult to approach that person and start a relationship out of thin air. Tinder or whatever application you use can do that hard work for you but as some of you probably know, there are some things that might happen that can be difficult to cope with.

Ghosting

Ghosting is when the other person just disappears. You seem to getting along very well and then he or she just runs away. They become a ghost and you have no idea what happened. At the end of the day, unless you have met them in the flesh, they were literally just words and pixels on a screen and maybe they are doing you a favour.

As a situational extrovert, we want to encourage you to get out of the house and meet people but we know that it can be a little difficult so apps are the best but don't rely on them 100%. If you get out of the house, you might never know who you will meet.

It's good to be back.

I've said this a few times over the last month that I'm going back to daily blogging. This blog is called The Daily RBL after all.

I've decided that today, December 1st, 2019 is the day that it starts again. Why December 1st? Because we all think because it is December why don't start on January 1st? What's the point in that?

Don't expect many epic blog posts in the coming days because it will take me a few days to create the habit again.

That's the whole idea for me to do this, to create the habit again and turn things around for me which have been going down a little recently.

Thank you again and I look forward to the next, I don't know how many posts.

A speech of mine at Toastmasters

Here is a speech I gave at Toastmasters a few years ago. Toastmasters is a great resource for building your confidence and I would recommend it for anyone:

(Silence for 30 seconds)

I read a book recently. It was called Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking. 

It was the second time I had read it and this time like a movie where you miss out on all the subtle hints that director was trying to show you in the first, the second time I got a lot more out of it. 

Before I go on, let me just tell you what I think an introvert and extrovert are. Basically my interpretation of the book.

Introvert – This is someone who is stimulated by being alone, being in solitude. Maybe they are reading a book, maybe they are sitting watching television, they are happy and contented by sitting at home doing nothing.

An extrovert on the other hand is stimulated by social encounters. They have to be out and about, at the latest parties. For those of you that use Facebook, you can identify these people who have posted 95 photos of the party they had at their apartment last Tuesday night, going like this …

Before I continue I would like to clarify about the difference between shyness and introversion. Shyness is fear of social judgment while introversion as I said is how you respond to stimulation.  

After reading the book and having extensive discussions with my friend I have come to the conclusion that I am an introvert. I don't want to make this sound like an AA meeting. Hello, I’m Blair and I’m an introvert however in today’s society it is almost considered a bad thing and the author of the book basically wrote it to say that it isn’t a bad thing. It isn’t a disease. 

We are up against a world that is set up for extroverts though. Work spaces that are set up for teams, and children who want to be by themselves seen as problems. 

Why I am here today is to tell you people who identify yourself as introverts that you are not alone and you don't have to feel bad or feel pressured that you want to stay at home on a Friday night while your extroverted friends are all fired up on red bulls and calling you anti-social for doing something that comes naturally to you. 

We have all had this I am sure. In fact one of my friends and I use that term very loosely used to make me feel like I was scum of the earth if I didn't come out and join him for a beer or twelve. When he would call he would ask, “What are you doing?” I would answer “nothing.” To him nothing meant that I wasn't doing anything so I should be out with a drink with him. I was busy doing nothing. Anyway, I no longer talk to that guy for other reasons. I discovered that he was a real user and would only contact me when he needed something. 

Now, lets get onto the part where you should embrace your role as an introvert. Introverts make great leaders. Why? Because they let the extroverts go. They let them crank up that creative storm that’s brewing in their heads and let them go crazy. The introverts are the stable people in the background pulling the strings. You put an extrovert in charge and they will want to ram their ideas down your throat. 

Remember as an introvert you are not alone. FDR’s wife Eleanor was an introvert. Dr. Seuss was an introvert. He used to hide himself in his house because he feared that children would be expecting him to be like his characters. Steve Jobs wouldn’t have the image he has now without Steve Wozniack.

Al Gore is an introvert. They say with introverts that if you send them off into a room full of people that they will come back with less energy than when they went in. Mr. Gore apparently needed a rest after those kinds of events like I will at the end of this speech. 

We know Mr. Gore for his movie, An inconvenient truth. He was very passionate about the subject but no one would listen to him. He basically had to make that movie because a bunch of extroverted congressman are not get be stimulated by a tiny crack in the ice. They need a super duper Hollywood extravaganza to grab their attention. 

Why do we make introverts feel so guilty about wanting to go off somewhere by themselves?

Western societies have always favoured the man of action instead of the man of contemplation. 

Despite all of this nonsense, I say embrace your introvertedness. I say if you want to stay at home and read a book or watch television on a Saturday night, don't feel embarrassed about it. In fact I remember one of the best nights was sitting at home with a good friend drinking a few beers watching sport. It was fantastic.

I say if someone tries to steamroll over you with fast words and gibberish, just let them go for it, they will be found it soon enough.

Being an introvert doesn't make you gay, as some people have thought about me in the past. It doesn’t make you snobby, as some people have told me in the past that they thought I was, it makes you who you are. So feel proud about who you are and what you do. Don't feel that you have to run around yahooing everywhere. It’s not you and it will make you tired and make you look like someone you are not.

What does "Introverted" mean?

What do people think "Introverted" means?

Most people think that "Introverted" means the following:

1. Socially awkward

2. Hates people

3. Shy

4. Bookworm

5. Too serious

6. People who can't be the extroverts

What does "Introverted" actually mean?

1. This is a term which categorises people who re-energise themselves by being alone or with someone who is really close to them.

Has that cleared it up for everyone?

Simple! Right?

HOW DOES YOUR VOICE HELP YOU?

Recently I have taken an interest in Theranos and it's rise and fall.

Theranos was established in 2003 by 19 year old Elizabeth Holmes. Theranos' USP was that they were able to take a small amount of blood and then use that to do a large number of tests.

Many high-profile people from the United States of America made investments in Theranos and over a ten year period they raised almost a billion US dollars. At one stage Theranos was valued at about US$9 billion while Elizabeth Holmes' net worth was valued at about half that at US$4.5 billion.

In 2015, an exposé by a writer from the Wall Street Journal questioned Theranos' technology and it all went down from there.

Both Holmes and the company president Sunny Balwani were charged with fraud and I heard that the trial will go ahead in August 2020.

This whole story has many angles. There is the scientific/technology angle. There is the financial angle and also the sociological angle.

Judging from what I have read and what I have watched in documentaries and news articles, I don't believe that Elizabeth Holmes went out to defraud investors of their money and hence become rich because of it. I believe that she really believed in her technology and in her idea and even down to the last minute she still believed that she could turn it around and that it could be on every street corner. Also, apparently she didn't profit in a huge way from 15 years of operations.

One of the interesting aspects of this story for a lot of people was Holmes's voice. She had a very deep voice that may or may not have been put on or not her actual, real voice. Personally, I find this aspect of the story very, very interesting.

My friend and I were discussing this the other day, our voice plays a big role in how people perceive us in society. For men, if you have a small or even feminine voice, it can be a problem for you in the future. Of course if you have a loud voice, that can create irritation throughout the groups of people that you interact with as well

Personally, my voice around people who I don't know can be quite low. I know here in Japan that people at places like convenience stores have to ask me again to say something. When I say that I don't need a plastic bag or chopsticks, sometimes I have to repeat myself or the shop assistant will give me those because:

a. they didn't hear me
b. they heard me but didn't understand it
c. they heard me, understood me but didn't believe that I had said anything.

There is a lot of resources on the Internet about how to increase the strength of your voice and how to project it better. I would suggest you check them out.

Deepening your voice can make you seem more authoritative. If you are a guy, a deep voice can make you seem more sexy and masculine to women and overall it just makes you seem more trustworthy and strong.

Personally, I think that a good strong voice is part of the trifecta:

1. Good posture

2. Good eye contact

3. Deep, strong voice

Work on these and you should start to feel confident, you may even start to feel better generally. Lets work on these things together and see how it goes.

It can't hurt, right?

TREAT THE JANITOR WITH THE SAME RESPECT AS YOU WOULD THE CEO

Never look down on anyone thinking you are superior. NEVER! What is that meme I've seen a lot:

"Treat the janitor with the same respect as you would the CEO." Apparently this quote is from Tom Hardy, a British actor.

We are all the same. That is why I got extremely annoyed at the library where I am writing this a couple of years ago. I was walking to the toilet as I usually do multiple times of day. The library shares a toilet with an event space. As it turned out on that particular day there was a "VIP" there. (I still have no idea who that was.) Anyway, I was told to go to the 1st floor toilet. I was on the 37th floor. WTF?

I don't understand how a person like that should have precedence over me. I'm here every day. They are there once every ten years. Surely you should look after your regulars more than the irregulars.

My friend told me a story of a time when he was at a pizza place that he had frequented on numerous occasions. He had asked for something that wasn't on the menu but he had had it before. Because the server was not trained to do that, he had said no. My friend was not happy and proceeded to give the place a 1 star rating. The owner contacted my friend afterwards and asked why. My friend told him the reason. He asked the server and the server said because the guy was a regular he didn't think he needed to do it. The server was told because my friend was a regular that is double the reason why you should look after him.

Look after the people who are regulars. They will always be there and they will bring in other people. The one-off people are good and they should be treated nicely but the regulars should be looked after. Treat them like a CEO even if they are a janitor.

Anyway, what does the title have to do with it anyway. Why do we have to give everyone titles? Who cares? We all end up under the ground anyway.

"Treat the janitor with the same respect as you would the CEO." - Tom Hardy. 

FOLLOW YOUR OWN PATH

Here is a quote from Jane Austen, the English novelist from the late 18th to early 19th century.:

"I wish, as well as everybody else, to be perfectly happy; but like everybody else, it must be in my own way."

This is a great quote and for a very simple reason. How can you be happy if you are living the life that every person around you expects you to live?

Live life on your terms, not anyone else's because if you do I assure you, you are going to regret it and even resent the people around you and that can never be good.

Follow your own path. That is the best advice I can give you today.

WHY? WHY? WHY?

I seem to be on a bit of a rant recently but I'm getting me really annoyed with a lot of the BS that is going on in the world today.

I was on the elevator coming up to the place where I am writing this post and I saw a news article in Japanese saying that there had been a mosque shooting in Oslo, Norway. Fortunately it seems that no one was killed which is great news but the fact that this incident happened is not a good thing at all.

I would like to know what goes on in people's heads that they feel the need to go and shoot innocent people while they are praying at their place of worship. Are we all taken in by the news media over-glamourising the 0.001% of that particular faith that think that other faiths should be consigned to hell? Or do they think that they are doing the world a favour by ridding it of these people?

I'm going on a airplane next week and I was thinking that I would take a 2 litre bottle of water on the plane so that I can sip on it from time to time during the flight as those cabins can get quite dry. Then I realised that you can't take onto a plane any liquids over 100mls.

All I have to say about that to those idiots is thank you very much (sarcasm). I suppose it is like the time at school when one idiot ruined it for everyone. I kind of wish knowing what I know now, that I asked the teacher if I could smack that perpetrator. It would be interesting to see what the teacher would have said. I'm sure in 2019 the parents would have made a complaint at the vigilante justice given out.

I hope the people in Oslo are OK. I also hope that people learn to live together as one and to learn that people who are different to you should be embraced and that you learn from them as opposed to feared and hated. Wouldn't that be nice? Or am I being a bleeding heart liberal? If so, so be it.

WHAT HAVE WE COME TO?

I read this article today. I was absolutely shocked by it all, especially hard on the heels of my post from a few days ago.

My only question is WHY? Why do these idiots feel a need to abuse someone because:

a. they don't have the same colour skin as them.

b. they come from a different country

c. they may not worship the same god as them.

I assure you, we are not born bigoted or prejudiced. We learn these habits growing up from our parents, our environment, even our schools. It makes you wonder why schools and religious organisations  are teaching this ridiculous stuff to the students. I don't get it.

Anyway, I can't say much more. I'll let the following guy say and he says very well. I wish that he didn't say it but unfortunately he has to. No, I'm not talking about Cristiano Ronaldo.

SOME QUOTES FOR INTROVERTS

Today, lets look at some quotes about introverts.

1. "I wish, as well as everybody else, to be perfectly happy; but like everybody else, it must be in my own way." - Jane Austen

Jane Austen, she of Pride and Prejudice and Sense and Sensibility fame. Yes, I agree. You definitely want to be happy but it has to be in your own way. What is the point of being happy for two days a week while being absolutely miserable for five days a week? It just doesn't work that way.


2. "I restore myself when I'm alone." - Marilyn Monroe

This is the ultimate definition of an introvert. Recharging when they are alone. I can relate very easily.


3. "We can't underestimate the value of silence. We need to create ourselves, need to send time alone. If you don't, you risk not knowing yourself and not realising your dreams." - Jewel

Yes, I agree. You need to spend time on your own to realise what you want in life. Whether that be in meditation, in journaling, maybe just even writing your goals out again and again.

4. "The greatest art is to sit, wait and let it come." - Yogi Bhajan


5. "Don't think of introversion as something that needs to be cured... Spend your free time the way you like, not the way you think you're supposed to." - Susan Cain

Ah, the patron saint of Introversion. When Susan Cain speaks, you listen. I agree 100000000% with this. There are many people who think that a Friday night means going out drinking  and raging at a nightclub. You should know how you recharge and you should know that this is best for YOU. Not anyone else.

WHY ARE YOU SO QUIET?

WHY ARE YOU SO QUIET?

Hands up if you have ever heard that. One or two of you. I have on numerous occasions. I remember a cricket team mate of mine would say "SHUT UP" to me when I was standing in the group not really making much noise. It threw me off the first couple of times he said it but I came up with a few replies that you can use to really change the mood of the whole occasion. Tell me how it works if you use them:

1. Does my silence bother you?

2. I'm very economical with my words

3. There wasn't an opportunity to get a word in.

4. Am I making you nervous?

5. I'm judging you.

6. I'm saving myself for the important things in life.

7. I've used up my word count for the day.

8. I don't want to spoil the moment so I left it to you.

My thoughts on the Israel Folau saga

I'm a rugby union fan. I grew up in New Zealand.

QUESTION: Did I have a choice about being a rugby fan?

ANSWER: Of course I did.

And that word, choice, is the basis of what I would like to talk about today.

I'm not going to bore you with the details about Israel Folau's situation. Lets just say he is in court at the moment contesting his contract with the Australian Rugby Union been torn up.

In April of 2019, Israel Folau posted on his Instagram the following:

When this came out (no pun intended) I was really annoyed with it all but I have changed my tune a little and I would like to explain my thoughts.

I don't have a problem with religion. I don't have a problem with free speech. I'm really happy that we live in a society in which we can speak our truth and say what is on our mind without fear of been put in jail. I feel proud that we live in a society in which people are free to worship whatever god they choose and (in most cases) not get persecuted because of it. Unlike the guy and his country below:

                               Image by Виктория Бородинова from Pixabay 

This brings me to the word CHOICE again.

People have a CHOICE to follow a religion or to believe in a particular god.

People have a CHOICE to have an alcoholic drink.

People have a CHOICE to cheat on their spouse.

People have a CHOICE to tell lies again and again.

People have a CHOICE to have sex outside of marriage.

People have a CHOICE to steal possessions from another person.

People have a CHOICE to not believe in a god if they so desire.

People have a CHOICE to worship an idol. (To be fair, I don't really understand what an Idolater is.)

However, people do not have a CHOICE about what their sexuality will be. Attraction is not a CHOICE. I'll repeat that, Attraction is not a CHOICE.

I didn't wake up one morning and decide that "today I'm going to want to have sex with women." It is  a natural thing that we develop as we grow up.

Whether Israel Folau deserved to lose his job or not is for the court to decide in the next few weeks.

As a rugby union fan I would like to see Israel Folau play in the Rugby World Cup this year because he is a good player, maybe even great and a strong Wallabies team is good for world rugby and the World Cup.

Israel Folau should be allowed to continued to post whatever he wants on Instagram because that is his basic human right. No argument from me, but I would say that he thinks a little bit more before posting anything in the future.

What if Cristiano Ronaldo posts on his Instagram the following?:

Hell Awaits:

Adulterers
Fornicators
Liars
Thieves
Drunks
Atheists
Tongan Australians
Idolaters

There would be similar outcry to his post in April and rightly so.

People who say that the drunk community didn't say anything about the post are trivialising the whole thing.

The court proceedings at the moment are to do with breach of contract, something which Israel Folau chose to do. Nothing to do with religious rights or freedom of speech. People should remember that.

Lets get back to what we should really be talking about:

DON'T BE LATE!

They say that there is only one thing in life that you can't get back.

If you lose money you can get it back and maybe even double or triple it. If you lose a significant other, you can either get him or her back or you will find someone even better. If you lose your six pack, you get it back with hard work and a dedicated eating regime.

However, if you lose time, that is one thing that you can never get back. I used to get pissed off that people would comment after watching a two minute video, "Well, that is two minutes of my life that I will never get back."

Come to think of it, they clicked on the video, so the only person to blame is themselves.

Lets get back to time. I get the most pissed off when someone doesn't respect my time. When, for example, they decide to be 30 minutes late. That really annoys me and sometimes I will just walk after 15 minutes if I haven't heard anything. I think with the proliferation of cell phones over the last 20 years, people are getting more and more lazier and they just think they can text the other person.

If you really want to freak someone out, tell them that you will meet them at 7pm on Friday and then tell them that you won't have your cell phone. I assure you people freak out.

"Oh, my god! What if I'm late?"
"You won't be late."
"What if you are late?"
"I'm never late."

It works though, they will be there on time.

What really gets my goat is people who are deliberately late as a power play. People who will organise the meeting at their office for 2pm and then keep their guests waiting until 2.10pm. Apparently there is a well known world leader who is always late. I would tell him (or her) but it is a him, to fuck off. Maybe the diplomatic relations between those countries would be bad but it would show that you don't take any shit. See Hugh Grant's character telling Billy Bob's character what is what and that he isn't going to take any manure in the video below.

What is the moral of today's story?

Don't be late and if you are going to be, try to anticipate it and tell your friend or acquaintance. It's easy. Isn't it?

WHY ARE WE QUICK TO JUDGE?

On the 19th of July, 2019 I posted about a man who was a hermit for 27 years in the Maine wilderness.

You can see the post below:

https://dailyrbl.blogspot.com/2019/07/27-year-hermit-what-fk.html

In the post, I referenced a BBC article:

https://www.bbc.com/news/stories-48968502

In that article, it talks about a Scottish woman who has lived a hermit lifestyle for a number of years and as she alluded, people thinks it is weird that she has decided to live by herself but if someone decided to sail around the world by themselves, then that would be awesome.

Isn't Western society interesting?

I equate this to someone who wants to stay at home and relax and not do much. They are considered to be a bit weird while they guy who goes out every night and takes a different woman back to his bachelor pad for a one night romp in the sack before calling her a taxi in the morning and telling her to fuck off is considered a stud and someone that most guys want to be. he probably has an Instagram account with 500,000 followers.

We are an interesting society. Why can't the woman live by herself without being judged? No, that's impossible because it makes me feel uncomfortable and because she does that I am going to judge her as a nutter.

(Actually, I don't think she is a nutter but that is what society, with nothing else to do has done.)

Hmmm, this has go the thinking, why do we have to judge?

Well, as I said before, it makes as feel better about ourselves because we are uncomfortable about it all so we will attack.

What do I care that you are on a plant based diet? Good on you.

What do I care that you worship a god that got lost in the desert or something? Nice for you.

What do I care that you like to wear high school girl's uniform when you are a 50 year old male? Hey, if it's comfortable whatever.

BUT, what I do care is that you tell me that my aunt can't get married to her girlfriend because it might offend your god. You show me that your god is offended then we might talk/

BUT what I do care is that you tell me that eating beef or pork is murder. It's bloody delicious, that's what it is.

BUT, what I do care is ...... No, you can wear that uniform, just no illegal stuff, right?

No judgement from me, whatsoever.

DO YOU TALK ON A PLANE?

The following was an interesting article:

https://japantoday.com/category/features/lifestyle/japanese-people-least-likely-to-talk-to-strangers-or-offer-help-on-airplanes-survey-finds

Basically it talks about Japanese people's behaviour on a plane. I found it very interesting because it talks about stereotypes and I know that some people are offended by stereotyping but unfortunately for those people these stereotypes do come from somewhere and they are usually true to an extent.

Since I have started to take an interest in this introvert/extrovert topic I have noticed that you can almost categorise certain countries. Of course not every person in that particular country is going to be extroverted or introverted but the majority in my opinion are going to be.

Japan is an introverted country in my opinion despite the groupism that proliferates across the country. I believe Japanese generally like to recharge by themselves or with one or two good friends.

About the English ability, I don't think it is the lack of ability it is just the confidence to use that English in their head, that's the problem. The idea that you have to be perfect doesn't really work when you are learning a language.

I tell you what, I don't think I want to spend a 10 hour plane ride with a gas bag to my left or right so if the person doesn't want to speak to me, thank god.

Helping someone out that is another matter all together and that has nothing to do with introvert/extrovert and everything to do manners and upbringing and that is a cultural thing which is completely different and a topic for another day.

HOW DO INTROVERTS CARE FOR YOU?

For some people (especially extroverts) introverts can be a bit of a closed book and some of the time you don't know exactly where you stand with them.

Let me tell you there are things that you can notice that means that the introvert or introverts in your life actually like and care for you.

Here are 6 examples:

1. If an introvert actually instigates something then he or she cares about you. I tell you something, we are not going to do it if we only half like you. We have just spent a day at work, interacting with people that get on our nerves and are particularly annoying, but the fact that we are wanting to spend some time with you instead of going home and recharging by ourselves means that you mean a lot. Go for it. It won't happen that often.


2. An introvert who likes you and wants to spend time with you will remember your birthday. They will remember stuff (sometimes unusual stuff) that you have told them about yourself. You might have told them that your favourite band growing up was WhiteSnake. Guess what? Guess who is going to text you or (god forbid) call you and tell you that WhiteSnake are playing in town next month? That's right.

By the way, WhiteSnake were supposed to play in Japan in October 2019 but they had to reschedule. What a pity!

3. We will be at your party, no doubt about that. If we care for you, we will be there absolutely no ifs or buts about it. As regular readers will know, the party is not the introvert's natural habitat. It can be a real step outside of that comfort zone for Mr. or Ms. Introvert to bowl along to that soiree. They are saying to you that you mean a lot and they wouldn't miss it for the world. Just don't be offended if they leave early.


4. If an introvert starts telling you his or her deepest, darkest secrets the you can safely assume that he or she is telling you that you mean a lot to him or her. Get it? You should be honoured as they have allowed you into their "inner circle" or should we say "The Circle of Trust." 

5. For an introvert, their alone time is like gold dust. They protect it with their life. However, when they invite you spend that time, that is a HUGE sign that they care, respect and maybe even love you. This is another reason that you need to take advantage of this situation because it may never happen again or may not happen again for a long time. You have probably shown to the introvert that you don't have to fill the silence with inane small talk and the like and you realise that just sitting there is fine.


6. If an introvert cared for you, they will never forget you. You may have drifted apart. You may have not seen each other for years and years but they will remember that you cared for them and that you gave them your time and if your paths cross again I'm sure that the introvert will let you back into his or her life. 

The introvert might not say it but as the old saying goes, "action is worth a thousand words" or is that "picture"? I sure you understand what I am saying. 

MINGLING CAN BE DIFFICULT: SOME COMMENTS

A couple of days ago we had a look at the following article:

https://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/life/94575135/new-zealanders-dont-mingle-well-at-parties-why

In some of the articles on this website they allow comments. I had a look at some of the comments and I thought that I would address some of them.

For those of you who didn't read the article, it talked about how New Zealanders are pretty terrible at mingling.

So lets have a look at some of the comments from the article:

It's so true I am from the UK and coming here (New Zealand) was hard going in the early days nearly all the friends I made at first were from other countries. 

I can understand this one quite well. As some of you might know, I live in Japan and this comment hit the nail on the head for Japan as well. There is the cultural and linguistic barrier first of all but more than that and I think it is the same with the UK person above, when you live in another country, who do you have most in common with? That's correct, people from other countries. Why is that? Because you are going through the same experiences as the other people. You portably have the same frustrations, the same complaints about the local culture. The comment above makes a lot of sense.


You are either good at mingling or not. I like parties where I know someone. It is a good safety net otherwise unless there are other distractions it is a completely lonely and horrible experience. 

I can understand exactly where this commentator is coming from however mingling is a skill that can be learned. You can go to a party with strategies that allow you to master small talk and to, god forbid, talk to people who you do not know, although don't talk too friendly because you might get into trouble like the guy in the video below.

I have no problems breaking the ice and starting conversations with strangers. Interestingly I normally receive a good response. I think the problem is not that we have no room or interest in talking to strangers, it's just that everyone is waiting for someone else to make the first move. I guess that just shows lack of self confidence.

This person has hit the nail on the head. You will find most people are going to be relieved at a party if you start up a conversation. The trick is not to dominate the conversation by talking and talking and talking and talking. I'm sure we have all had times when we went to a party like that and we couldn't exit ourselves from that person who couldn't stop talking. . The person just went on and on. It was like torture. If you can be a connector also, that makes a great party person.


I am the opposite. I normally head for strangers to meet and greet. Done it all my life and will continue until I die. Love socialising and meeting new people. Normally keeping within your little circle can become monotonous with boring conversation.

Sure as life goes on your circle might grow apart a bit. Some of your circle might get married and have children. While this might be ok with people who are having this experience, the single people or ones with no children might find it difficult. Don't depart from your circle. By all means introduce yourself to different people but remember who was there for you in your difficult times and keep them by your side.
It's so true I am from the UK and coming here was hard going in the early days nearly all the friends I made at first were from other countries. Having travel widely as a young person I can say 10th is article is pretty bang on my experience of kiwi social habits compared to other how people socialize in other parts of the world kiwis do seem very closed group and uneasy talking to strangers
It's so true I am from the UK and coming here was hard going in the early days nearly all the friends I made at first were from other countries. Having travel widely as a young person I can say 10th is article is pretty bang on my experience of kiwi social habits compared to other how people socialize in other parts of the world kiwis do seem very closed group and uneasy talking to strangers
It's so true I am from the UK and coming here was hard going in the early days nearly all the friends I made at first were from other countries. Having travel widely as a young person I can say 10th is article is pretty bang on my experience of kiwi social habits compared to other how people socialize in other parts of the world kiwis do seem very closed group and uneasy talking to strangers

It's so true I am from the UK and coming here was hard going in the early days nearly all the friends I made at first were from other countries. Having travel widely as a young person I can say 10th is article is pretty bang on my experience of kiwi social habits compared to other how people socialize in other parts of the world kiwis do seem very closed group and uneasy talking to strangers

I AM NOT STUCK UP

I'm not sure who posted this but it sums it up very well:

https://www.instagram.com/p/B0KOzfoBtjL/

Here goes:

YES, I'm an introvert.
NO, I'm not shy.
NO, I'm not stuck up.
NO, I'm not antisocial
I'm just listening
I'm just observing.
I can't stand small talk. But I'll talk about life for hours.
I'd rather be home with a close friend or tow than among a crowd of acquaintances.
Don't scold me in public.
Don't embarrass me in public.
Respect that I am reserved. And if I open myself up to you, know that means you're very special to me.


I couldn't have summed it up any better if I tried.

The line that struck a chord with me is the I'm not stuck up.

Yep, that is true. I can't be fucked listening to all your bullshit. DOn't take it personally, just find someone who cares. I don't.

ARE WE BAD AT MINGLING?

https://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/life/94575135/new-zealanders-dont-mingle-well-at-parties-why

Have a look at the above article.

Kiwis, do you agree that we suck at mingling at parties?

What do you think?

I think it is the same anywhere in the world. Recently I was invited to a friend's wedding party. In Japan that is known as the nijikai. (Knee-G-Kai). This is the party after the reception where friends congregate.

What I noticed was similar to what the article was alluding to and it is similar to a lot of 21st's in New  Zealand, you can see the different sections in a person's life.

At a 21st you might see the person's school friends in one group, the person's sports friends in another group, the person's university friends in another group, the person's part time work friends in another, family in the corner. It was the same at the wedding party I went to.

How can we get over this?

Well, there is no magic pill. Unfortunately you have to break the ice some how. Also you have to take the risk that you are going to be thought of as weird. Remember that is their decision. Not yours.

Good luck.

Monday, Monday!!!

I'm sure that we have all had this problem. We try to wake up on a Monday morning and things just don't happen. We have had a productive weekend, we've got things done. We have meet friends and we have been sociable. We have been to the gym at least once and had a good blow out. We have made some good food because we have time to experiment in the kitchen.

HOWEVER, Monday morning rolls around and we have no energy at all. Maybe we slept in on Sunday and because of that your rhythm  is off. You stayed up late on Sunday night because you couldn't get to sleep.

Does this all sound familiar?

It happened to me this weekend and I have not had a very good Monday morning at all. It has been zero productivity. It hasn't been a good start to the week.

So, what can we do to correct this problem?

Well, we first of all can create a consistent bed time and a wake up time and maintain it during the weekend as well.

Also, if you don't have any reason to get up you won't. You need to have that goal so you are so excited to get up and get going and to kick ass.

Start today to create that bedtime and do your best to keep it up for at least 21 days. They say that it takes 21 days to create a habit.

Good luck.

WHAT IS A PAP?

WARNING: The following contains some quite "colourful" language. If you are easily offended by this please do not read on. I'll repeat that, if you are easily offended, please do not read on. OK?


I'm a cunt. Yes! You read that correctly. I am a cunt. Now, before you ask me if I am referring to the woman's genitals, no I'm not. I'm referring to the name that we call each other. I know that in America that the mere utterance of it can start a war while in the United Kingdom, in some cases it is a term of endearment.

Like most words, in my opinion anyway, it is not necessarily the word itself. A word is just a jumble letters put together in a pattern. What makes the word offensive or whatever is how it is used. How the tone of your voice is used. What the expression on your face is. Your body language.

"What does this have to do with anything?" I hear you ask.

This morning I went to the convenience store on the way to the place where I am writing this post. As usually I bought a couple of bottles of water and went to the register.

For some of you, who haven't been to Japan, let me explain the process at a Japanese convenience store. You take your things to the counter, the shop assistant says something that is loosely translated as "Welcome." They they ring up the products, tell you the price and put the products in a plastic bag. Sounds like most places in the world right? Except for the plastic bag bit. I know that some countries, for example, New Zealand, ban the use of single use plastic bags.

Anyway, the guy behind the counter just looked at me and said nothing. Zilch, not a sausage, bugger all as a social studies teacher of mine used to say.

Admittedly, the service in Japan can be rather robotic and annoying at times, but when you don't get it, it can seem a bit off-putting. For example, this morning I went to the register and the guy looked at me and said nothing. He then rang up the stuff and said nothing. I looked at the register and then looked at him and asked if he wasn't going to say the price. I said that in Japanese. He said the price in English.

All of this sounds to you, probably like a nothing incident but it pissed me off for a few minutes. Why does this guy look at me and decide that the normal service is above me because of the colour of my skin?

Now, let me just say that the guy was not a Japanese national but my point is why don't I get the same service?

Anyway, a few minutes after I thought about it and I thought that I was an almighty cunt. It was 9 o'clock in the morning. The guy may have been working all night. Also, he had been a little rude. It isn't the end of the world. What I should have done was just smile and walk out. No harm, no foul.

I've found that I have been doing this kind of thing a lot recently and it is not really good. My friend has a scientific name for it:

Passive Aggressive Prick

I think the message in this story is to just let it go. What is that saying? Is it going to matter in 5 years? I mean today's "happening" didn't matter 5 minutes later let alone 5 years later but here I am blogging about it.

I've been trying something the last couple of weeks, when I see something in particular it is like a trigger to remind myself to be happy, to just smile. I think some people think I might be a bit weird as I suddenly break into a big smile as I walk down the street but that is their problem not mine. I'm just trying to make myself feel good.

I'm not going to tell you what the trigger is but if you want to do the same, you create your now trigger. It might feel a little strange for a bit but once you get used to it, it is actually a good way to overcome things that might be stressing you out. Just smile and fill your head with uplifting images. That's all there is to it.

27 YEAR HERMIT: WHAT THE F**K!

Have a look at this article:

https://www.bbc.com/news/stories-48968502

This guy walked out of his house when he was 20 years old and basically lived alone for 27 years and in all that time he only spoke to one person who stumbled upon his camp one day and even then the only thing he said was "hi."

My friend and I were discussing this story and we were thinking about how many people clear their throats when they haven't spoken for a few hours. What happens when you haven't spoken for YEARS? My friend reckons you would be coughing up your lungs.

The 27 year hermit didn't really want to speak to the media but there is another woman in Scotland who lives a hermit lifestyle.

What she says is very interesting:

She says many people think being a hermit is selfish.

"If I say I want to sail a small boat all the way around the world and it will take me two years, everyone says, 'Oh how exciting!' If I say I want to go and sit in my house and not talk to anyone for two years, they say 'Have you got mental health issues?' or 'Why are you so selfish?'"

She makes a great point and to be honest, I can't come up with a reason why our society looks at these two things differently. Maybe because if you are in a sail boat for two years, you have no where else to go but if you decide to live by yourself then that is a choice and you can engage with other people.

Would you spend 27 years in solitude? I know I wouldn't. I like the contact of people from time to time and you should to. Remember an introvert lifestyle is not trying to avoid people every minute of the day. An introvert lifestyle is when you know that your energy has run out and you need to recharge. You know when to get out of that party without worrying what the extroverts will say or think of you. There is no need to avoid people altogether.


RELATED POSTS:

https://dailyrbl.blogspot.com/2017/01/are-you-hermit.html

https://dailyrbl.blogspot.com/2016/10/the-okinawan-naked-hermit.html

WALK AWAY

Sometimes it is better to say nothing and walk away. It's a challenge but I'm sure we can do it.

STUDY BROADLY, LEARN A LANGUAGE, READ AND ATTRACT THE BEST PEOPLE

I saw this very interesting quote on Instagram the other day:

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bz0t5iZAPec/

If you can't open it here it is:

"So here's my advice: Study broadly and without fear. Learn a language if you can, because that will make your life more interesting. Read a little bit every day. But more importantly, surround yourself with people who you like and make cool stuff with them. In the end, what you do isn't going to be nearly as interesting or important as who you do it with." - John Green

There are some good points here. Lets go through them.

Study broadly: Yes I agree with that. I think it makes you a rounded person. I think that people who only know one thing can be a little socially inept and the conversations around them are average at best and if you don't know about their speciality it can be a bit boring. Get out there, learn about things, learn about what is going on in the world, learn about stuff.


Learn a langauge: I have blogged about this in the past. Take a look at the following:

https://dailyrbl.blogspot.com/2016/07/finding-right-language.html

https://dailyrbl.blogspot.com/2017/06/what-do-you-call-someone-who-can-only.html

https://dailyrbl.blogspot.com/2017/07/learn-language.html

When you learn a language you world opens up a great deal. You learn a lot about yourself and you upbringing as well. I have learned stuff about English that I had never heard before.


Read a little bit every day: I have been trying to do this for a long time. Admittedly I don't do it every day but I will try to do some reading after I post this. Read a little bit every day relates back to the first one about studying broadly. You might read a lot about your speciality but reading every day helps you to talk about things that you might not have an idea about but with that one little bit of knowledge you might be able to engage someone in that topic.

https://dailyrbl.blogspot.com/2016/10/does-small-talk-scare-you.html (Look at number 4 in this post)


Surround yourself with the best people: They say that you are the average of the five people you hang out with the most. Is this true? Probably. You want to create things with these kinds of people and because they are the best, you are going to create quality stuff.


Read that quote again and try to apply those things to your life. I'm sure your life will get better and better as you attract better and better people and things into your life. Good luck.

Cricket World Cup

It would be amiss of me not to comment on one of the best sporting contests that I have ever seen. Before I carry on, I'll let you be the judge:

You might not be a cricket fan but the excitement and happenings in the game may never be repeated. I won't explain what happened here but let me just say that a game like that will never be seen for such a long time.

To play for almost 8 hours and to have a tie not only in the first 100 overs but in the super over (penalty shoot-out) was amazing.

I'm a New Zealander so my opinion might be biased but as I see it New Zealand didn't actually lose the game. They came second in the competition but they didn't actually lose the final and they should take pride from that. At this moment, it doesn't actually mean anything because they are not World Cup Champions but I'm sure if they look back on it they will remember that fact and take pride in that they participated in such a wonderful game of cricket.

Amazing!

Congratulations England and Kia Kaha New Zealand.

"YOU CAN BE ANYBODY YOU WANT."

I'm not a big gambler. I do have the odd flutter from time to time. For example I put NZD$10 on the New Zealand cricket team to beat the Indian team in the semi-finals of the World Cup in 2019. That was a nice win.

Occasionally I punt on the horses or dogs. That is fun.

Admittedly I have no idea what is happening at a casino. I don't understand any of the games. About the only game I had any idea of what I was doing was at the Crown Casino in Melbourne, it was called The Big Wheel or something like that. Lets just say it was fun and no harm was done to anyone.

For some reason a couple of my favourite movies are ones about gambling.

Rounders is about professional poker players who travel around looking for poker games. I don't know why I enjoy it because I don't know anything about poker but I do.

The second movie which was released in 2008 is called 21. It is based on a gambling group from the Massachusetts (that is difficult to spell) Institute of Technology who basically cleaned out some casinos if that is possible.

I have watched 21 a couple of times and what I like about it is the following line from the movie:

"In Vegas you can be anybody you want."

I think this is good advice for the situational extrovert. Many people like to give the advice that you should be yourself, which is well meaning but pretty crap advice.

I recommend that on occasions you play a character. If it is a networking event for example, you might need to do that. If you are trying to attract a member of the opposite sex then I wouldn't advise it because it will come back and bite you in the arse in the long term when he or she realises that you are not who you are when you were at that soiree.

You can be anybody you want but remember it is only for a short time.

Good luck.

RESTARTING MY DAILY BLOG

I have decided to restart my daily blogging. This will be from July 14th, 2019. I know that I have said this before but I never had my mind 100% in it.

The whole idea for blogging for me is to create something on a daily basis and to use this to create more and more. While doing this I hope to create some value for you, the reader, with the hope that you will come back the next day and the next day and the next day.

I look forward to your support over the coming months.

Thank you.

                    START ME UP INDEED

INTROVERTS AND EXTROVERTS DEFINED

I saw this meme on Instagram the other day. It sums it perfectly. It is one of the best descriptions I have ever seen.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BxWV7N9hmFk/

It says, "Introverts run on re-chargeable batteries while extroverts run on solar panels."

That is perfect. That's exactly what it is all about.

That's all. Short and sweet.

Introverts do talk

It's going to be a short and sweet post today.

For all of you people out there who think that introverts don't like to talk, think again. Introverts just don't like to make small talk.

I would like you to watch the above scene from the movie The 40-Year Old Virgin. I think that this is a classic scene and to be honest, it is a little hard to watch, cringeworthy almost. (By the way, there is some "colourful" language in this clip so if you are offended by that, don't watch it.)

Did you watch it?

Can you see that Steve Carell's and Seth Rogen's characters are the complete opposite?

Cal (Seth Rogen) is talking about his weekend in which he had a fun time and did something, in his mind anyway, that was cool and should be talked about forever. However, introverted Andy (Steve Carell) couldn't really care less because he had a good time by himself and that egg salad sandwich was obviously important to him but to an extrovert that sounds like torture, hence the shooting himself in the head at the end of the scene.

Let me leave you with this, Introverts do like to talk but you have to pick a topic that they are interested in. Unfortunately a woman having sex with a horse in Tijuana is not going bring that out in them no matter how "cool" you think it is.

Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in and you won't be able to shut them up for hours. They will talk with passion, with enthusiasm and "fluency." Talking about something insignificant will not do that.

(I'm sorry, horses in Tijuana are not interesting.)

WHAT IS FUN FOR YOU IS NOT GOING TO BE FUN FOR ANOTHER PERSON

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bwxfwafgrzh/

The above link is one of the best Instagram posts I have ever seen. It sums it up perfectly.

This guy, Steve Bartlett hits the nail on the head. Let me quote him just in case you haven't clicked on the link.

"Don't subscribe to other people's definition of "fun."

Fun doesn't have to mean drinking, partying and socialising.

Fun can be a night in alone, getting lost in a book, a deep conversation, a walk, creating art, playing music or doing your work!

Fun is yours, you define it."

I couldn't agree with this guy more. Who says that you have to go out and drink yourself into a stupor? People who do these kinds of things are usually the, lets say 'more robust' people in society.

They think and they don't mind saying it in stereo sound that if you are not having fun in their way that you are "weird" or maybe you are "strange" or maybe you are "anti-social." I say that those people are the weird ones. Actually, that is bringing myself down to their level. As Mr. Bartlett says above, you decide what fun is. Actually I am having fun writing this. I've got some music playing in my ears. I'm in a nice environment. This is fun. There is no alcohol around, there is no dancing going on.

Remember, if you want to stay home on a Friday night and relax, that is fine. Who cares? You are doing what you want to do and that is fun.

YOU NEED SOMEONE. WE ALL DO!!!

Have you ever been to the movies by yourself?

I've been maybe two or three times. I remember I watched A Beautiful Mind by myself in Edinburgh.

I also watched The Dictator by myself in my hometown in New Zealand. I remember laughing at some jokes, one about Silvio Berlusconi comes to mind although the young(er) people around me didn't get it.

Anyway, as an introvert I'm invariably by myself. As I write this, I am in the library that I come to on a regular basis. There are many people around me but I am basically on my own.

I don't work at an office so I'm walking around Tokyo by myself and I live by myself too.

The weird thing is though, when I want to go to the movies or want to do something like travelling, I prefer to go with someone else. I can go to a small cheap restaurant or go to a family restaurant by myself but a decent restaurant I would prefer someone else there with me.

Why is this? You would think that because I spend most of my time by myself and you would think because I live by myself that I would have no problem sitting in a fancy restaurant or travelling around Europe by myself. It's strange isn't it? Lets try to figure this one out.

Lets start with the fancy restaurant. In this kind of establishment 99.9% of the time, you will see couples or groups there. Maybe a man or a woman are on a date and what do they do on a date? They talk. Maybe there is group of couples or a group of business people celebrating their latest deal. The thing is that they all have someone to talk to and being there by yourself, you don't have that luxury.

Lets say you want to travel around Eastern Europe by yourself. As a young person you know that you will probably stay in youth hostels or the like. you may even have to share a room with a complete stranger. You might go on an occasional group excursion but basically you are going to be by yourself navigating the wonderful countries of that area.

I can only go by my experience. I'm not the most gregarious person to ever walk the face of this planet so just striking up conversations with complete strangers are not my forte. Some people, I'm looking at you extroverts out there can go up to a complete stranger and suddenly be their best friend. For me, it is safety in numbers

I think with the restaurant example, the idea of sitting by myself is ok but everyone else is sitting talking while I'm sitting there doing nothing. In those kind of establishments pulling out a smart phone or reading a newspaper may not be the classiest thing to do.

Remember even though you might classify yourself as an introvert, sometimes you need people around you and they need you as well. It is not just a one way street. They really do need you. REMEMBER THAT!

ARE YOU A C**T?: I don't think so.

WARNING! Offensive language ahead. If you are easily offended by four letter words (I don't know why, they are only words after all) or expletives or what have you, I would suggest not reading on. Please do not say you haven't been warned.

This post on Instagram I thought was hilarious. It was on an account called The Funny Introvert.

"You have this 3 pound organ in your skull that's so fucking amazing it literally defies the laws of it's own construction and you use it to watch the Bachelor and be a cunt."

I was reading this in the library and usually I'm not a LOL type of guy but I couldn't help myself this time. The people around me certainly liked at me a little strange as I couldn't really control the sounds coming out of my mouth for a few seconds.

I think what got me originally was the use of the word "cunt." Where I come from the word is thrown around quite liberally and in England in some circumstances it is almost used as a term of endearment.

Here is the Canadian comedian Russell Peters explaining the use of the word as well as anyone:

I think in the above "quote" though the word "cunt" is equated to mean an idiot. It is saying that we are not acting or doing things to our full potential. We are not living our lives to the absolute fullest.        

We get home after slaving through our 9 to 5's or if you live in certain places, our 9 to 9's. We blob out in front of the television or netflix or what have you and that's it. We are up the next morning with little energy and do it all over again. Is that living our dream life? I 100% doubt it. By living like that we are literally become a cunt. Not good. Not good at all.

I know that it is a cliche but life is for living. It is for us to get out there and grab it by it's tail and say "You are mine. You are going to be great and you are going to kick ass on each and every day."

So sort out that boring routine. Sort out your finances. Sort out your sleeping time. Sort out your diet. Sort out your exercise and health routine. Sort out your relationships. Sort out everything and live that life that you know 100% in your mind that you are capable of.

Do you know what? Your life will become more and more enjoyable. Your finances will start to become better and money will start coming from places you didn't even know. You will start to have more and more energy. That beer belly will miraculously disappear. Those muscles that you never thought you had will suddenly appear and last but certainly not least that certain special someone will appear or in some of our lives reappear and you will have manifested the life you always dreamed of.

Remember though to not put off happiness until all of those things eventuate. The trick is to be happy now. Be happy about your current situation. Be happy about what you have. Be happy about that roof over your head. Be happy about that food in your fridge and the water in the glass. Express gratitude for all of those things. Heck, express gratitude for the thoughts in your head. It means you are alive and you can contribute to this society.

This is the reason that people who seem to have everything, the money, the huge house, the hot spouse seem to not be happy because rather than expressing that gratitude for what they have, they want more and they are making their lives miserable.

Are you cunt? I'm sure you are not. Live like it.