Thursday 31 May 2018

HOROSCOPES?????

How many of you have read your horoscope in the newspaper or wherever?

I know some of you are probably a bit embarrassed by admitting that. I mean sometimes the horoscope say something like:

"You will go to the toilet today. You will also drink water."

"Oh my god" you think to yourself, "that is exactly what happened to me today. It's true." This is until you take a second look at what you just read and realise what is obvious.



However, I'm not here to pour scorn on horoscopes. I'm here to talk about why there seems to be a connection between Introverts and Virgos. Why is this? I don't get it.

I am a Virgo. My mother is also a Virgo. I would classify us as both introverts. Is this a coincidence or is there something in it? Lets have a look.

From my "research" Virgos are considered perfectionists. (I wouldn't call myself a perfectionist but you should see my mother's house. Not a hair out of place, so to speak.)

Virgos are considered intellectual (I'm talking men here) and they are generally kind and have a good sense of humour. (Shit! I'm talking about myself here.)

For any women reading this out there, if you attract the attention of a Virgo male, you  are damm lucky (I'm not saying this because I'm a Virgo. It is just what I read.). He has taken his time and he knows that he really wants you. It isn't just a one night fling. It is for real. So be prepared.

I can imagine that with introverts. They don't have the social energy to go out and date multitudes of women (there are exceptions though). They will pick someone they fancy and if everyone is lucky, they have a connection.

Talking abut connections, that brings me back to the original question.

Is there a connection between introverts and Virgos?

My scientific answer is that I don't know. However, with most stereotypes, it must have come from somewhere. All I can say if you meet someone who is really into you, then you are very lucky and don't take it for granted because if you are sloppy, they could be gone forever.

Tuesday 29 May 2018

AN INTROVERT'S HOBBIES?

I saw an interesting meme the other day about an introvert's hobbies and I thought that I would analyse it to see if it is true for me and probably of other introverts out there.

First of all, let me introduce the URL so you know what I am talking about:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BjQ5fDoBQ_s/?taken-by=cap.city.introvert

Lets have a look at these four things:

1. Switching between the same three apps for hours

Oh yes! I can totally relate to this. Unlike some people who seem to have thousands of apps on their phones, I have very few but the ones that I do use get a thorough airing. It is interesting when you think of the 80/20 principle and this even applies to the use of apps as well. You use 20% of your apps, 80% of the time.




2. Not speaking to anyone for days at a time

Oh yes! I can do this easily. Saying "thank you" to the food delivery people doesn't count, right? I'm not sure what my record is but I think that it could be more than a week.




3. Listening to the same songs I have been listening to for 20 years.

Oh yes! I have one question, what's wrong with that? Music is totally subjective. What one person loves, one person hates. I'm listening to Pitbull as I write this. Some of you are probably thinking what a loser. Whatever.




4. Imagining myself in situations that will literally never exist

Oh yes! Guilty as charged. But, you never know, you might manifest some of these into reality if you believe it enough and you do the work to allow it the chance to happen. So, why not dream big?

Monday 28 May 2018

SWEET HOME ........ PALMERSTON NORTH

Today, I'm going off the topic of introvert/extrovert and paying homage to my home town of Palmerston North, New Zealand. Enjoy the song and play the video to understand the lyrics.



Big wind keeps on blowing
Flying me home to eat my din'.
Singing songs about the hinterland
I miss old Palmy once again and I think about it with a grin

Well I heard Mister Cleese talk about her
Well I heard ole Basil put her down
Well I hope John Cleese will remember 
A Manawatu man don't need him around anyhow

Sweet home Palmerston North
Where the skies are so ....... true
Sweet home Palmerston North
Lord (oh Lord) I'm coming home to you

In Massey University they love the vice-Chancellor, boo-hoo-hoo
Now we all studied a paper or two
What's his name doesn't bother me
But did you do it? Tell the truth

Sweet home Palmerston North
Where the skies are so ....... true
Sweet home Palmerston North
Lord (oh Lord) I'm coming home to you, here to have fun

Now Kelvin Grove has got Toyota
And they've been known to build a car or two (yes they do)
Lord they drive me around so much
They pick me up when I threw, now to have a few

Sweet home Palmerston North
Where the skies are so ....... true
Sweet home Palmerston North
Lord (oh Lord) I'm coming home to you

Sweet home Palmerston North, oh sweet home
Where the skies are so ....... true and the Lido's blue
Sweet home Palmerston North
Lord (oh Lord) I'm coming home to you

Sunday 27 May 2018

Sports teams and the Introverts

A friend of mine has started working for a professional sporting team. Wherever the team goes he goes with them and he is enjoying all of the trappings of professional sports, the buffets, the free tickets, the nice hotels and just generally hanging out with professional sports people on a day to day basis. (He hasn't said anything about the groupies but maybe his wife is reading this so I better stop with that theme.)


It has got me thinking, would I like this job? It sounds like the dream job for someone who likes sports. Following a team around. Seeing the operation from the inside. Learning new things about the sport and the how it is run as a business. It sounds pretty cool doesn't it?

(By the way, I do know that this photo is not from a professional football game. I think it is from a college game. Don't know which college though.)

My one concern would be if I did it is, how much "alone" time would I get? Would I be able to retreat to my room every night and just be myself or would I have to eat dinner with the team and hang out with the team members when I'm away on a road game? As we all know, introverts need their alone time to recharge, would you get much of that?


The point today is that sometimes even if the job sounds like your dream job, it might not necessarily fit your personality and the dream could turn into a nightmare. Really think about it before accepting anything. Does the job require a lot of socialising after normal working hours? Does the job require going out on the golf course or tennis court on your Saturdays and Sundays? Does it require touring around with a big group of people?

My friend is loving it and I hope that he can continue loving it for a few more seasons yet. I hope that you love what you do.

Friday 25 May 2018

Plans changed at the last minute.

 Today's post is for the guy's. So ladies out there, you can either tune out or read something and learn about yourself that you might not really know and if you do know this then you are cruel.


You are probably wondering why there is a picture of a chocolate bar. Well, this is one of my favourite chocolate bars, the Flake. It is so good. Please buy some if you don't believe me.

So, lets go back to the photo, why is there a picture of a Flake, well, it is because people flake on you. This means that they will cancel plans that they had with you at the last minute with some weird reason.

Why do they do this? Because when they said yes to your invitation, they didn't really want to say yes, it was just safer to say yes than to have an awkward moment. This is really selfish on their account of the person who is the flaker. Usually they do it out of insecurity.

Flaking can be really frustrating for the flakee.

In my experience, women do this to men all the time thinking that if they say yes and flake then they are not really been mean but in fact they are been the worst kind. They are being really cruel and I can tell you from experience that it does not feel good because as a guy you may have had prepared a cool date. You might have made reservations that you have to pay a deposit for and you can't get back if you cancel.

What can you do about it?

I suppose the best thing is to not get angry. Anticipate that this might happen and have a backup plan so that the day or night is not a total loss. Also chalk it up to one of life's experiences.

Tuesday 22 May 2018

IS THIS AN INTROVERTED JOB?

I read a profile the other day about business consultant, Ram Charan. What I read I had to take with a grain a salt. Well, not really a grain of salt, more like the whole salt shaker. Anyway, it said that he doesn't have a house, basically he lives in airports and hotels. That could be possible I suppose but it also says that he travels 250,000 miles a week. That's where you have to be careful about what you read. So basically he travels 10 times around the world every week and if there is 168 hours in a week and he travels 250,000 miles then he is travelling 1500 miles every hour which you have probably worked out already is impossible. I think that that was a typo and it was 250,000 miles a year.

After reading this short little profile, it reminded me of this movie:



Have you seen this one? It is a George Clooney movie from 2009 called 'Up in the Air.' George Clooney plays a guy who works for a HR consultancy in Omaha, Nebraska. He basically travels all over the United States of America firing people for a living.

In the movie George Clooney's character "lives" in Omaha but he says that he spent only 43 days there in the previous year. So he was on the road for 323 days (I think it was a leap year) living in hotels, travelling first class and enjoying the hospitality of the airport lounges.

What do you think? Could you live this kind of lifestyle? Travelling from city to city, not being in the same city two days in a row. Not really developing relationships and being by yourself everyday and every night.

This sounds like introvert heaven, doesn't it? Well, yes and no. If you are someone who doesn't want to develop meaningful relationships then that kind of lifestyle is definitely for you, however I believe that most people do, so maybe this kind of life is better for an extrovert who can probably strike up conversations with people around them and find things to do.

How you deal with lonesomeness is the key to this kind of lifestyle and an introverted person could easily lock themselves away and not talk to anyone outside their work related activities and that could be a disastrous thing for him or her.

Please remember that for introverts it isn't all about being being alone. It isn't all about being at home by him or herself watching a movie on Netflix. Introverts still like the idea of being with their significant other. They still want to spend time with him or her either talking or eating or even just being.

I must admit though that the traveling lifestyle does have some appeal to me and I wonder how long I would last before I go crazy. I do enjoy some of my routine like going to the gym and visiting the same places for socialising. Hmmm, something to think about it.

If you have a chance, have a look at this movie and see how it applies to you and your circumstances.

Sunday 20 May 2018

GIVE AN INTROVERT A FEW DAYS TO PROCESS YOUR REQUEST

I saw the following meme the other day:

https://me.me/i/when-someone-asks-to-go-out-the-night-of-without-17536566

It shows a lady who looks pretty indignant and the caption is:

"When someone asks to go out the night of, without allowing 3 business days for mental preparation."

That begs the question, why are introverts not very spontaneous?

Well, it says it all in the meme, we do need preparation time. We need time to psyche ourselves up because, please remember that you are taking us out of our natural environment. You know, at home either by ourselves or with our significant others, cooking dinner, sleeping or even netflixing and chilling.

Believe it or not when an introvert says they are doing nothing, it means that that is what they have planned and they have been looking forward to it all day and possibly all week. So, when you suddenly ask an introvert out, they are going to have trouble with that. They are simply not prepared. I'm not joking when I say that.

If you recognise your friend as an introvert, allow them a few days to process your request and don't take it personally if they say "no."

Remember that they will go. They like going out as much as you do, just not as often.

But, dear extroverts, do not, let me repeat that, do not make them feeling guilty for turning down your request. They are not doing it to be anti-social. They are not doing it because they don't like you. They are doing (or not doing it) it because they, for that moment in time are being true to themselves. Let that introvert be. Just let them be what they are.

Saturday 19 May 2018

Are you 9 to 5?

Regular readers will notice that I haven't posted anything for a few days. I apologise for that. Lets just say that I have been a little lazy.

They say that success happens outside the hours of 9am to 5pm. They say that what you do outside of those hours will go long way to how much money you will have in your life and how much success will come your way.

The past week I have been working from 9am to 6.30pm and basically talking for that entire time. As you can probably imagine, by the time I get back to my hotel I am absolutely knackered that all I can do is get something to eat, maybe watch a movie and fall asleep to do it all over again the next day.

I have neglected this blog and I have neglected other things that I like to do on a daily basis and as far as I am concerned, it is not good enough.

We know that a lot of people work their 9 to 5. They go home. They eat dinner. They watch television until they can't hold their eyes open anymore and they go to sleep and wake and do it again.

That kind of lifestyle is not good enough for me. I don't think it is good enough for anyone.

Maybe you can't burn the candle at both ends but you should be able to pick a time, either before work or after work to work on yourself. To write that blog post, to do those push ups, to do that meditation, to visualise your future, to chant your affirmations, to write a journal, to work on your side business that you want to take full time in the near future.

Don't waste your time. Treasure it. It is precious. We only have a finite amount of time on this planet. Do as you wish but make it valuable. Make it noteworthy.

MAKE IT GREAT!!!


Monday 14 May 2018

Another Introvert 101

Just because an introvert likes to be alone it doesn't mean that he or she wants to be alone all the time.

Introverts like to be intimate with their significant other. They like to spend quality time with he or she.

So, just because the introvert doesn't want to go out with you on a Friday night doesn't mean they are being anti-social, it just means that they are conserving their energy and they might be ready the next time so don't stop asking them.

Friday 11 May 2018

Are people who are not on social media, weirdos?

I read this article today. I found it very interesting especially the "being relevant" part.

This article  was written by a 17 year old and without trying to sound condescending, it shows maturity way beyond his years. Lets just say that I wish that I had that kind of maturity when I was 17.

Basically the article is about the young man deleting all of his social media. Whether he deleted the app from his phone or he deleted all of his accounts, outright, I am not sure but in 2018 I believe that kind of action shows a lot of balls.

He says that his "friends" look at him as a loser and that he is weird because he has decided to break away from the herd and not do what everyone else is doing.

This reminds me of a quote. I've seen it attributed to Jim Carrey but I'm not 100% sure:

"I saw a guy at Starbucks today. He had no smartphone, tablet, or laptop. He just sat there drinking his coffee. Like a psychopath."

I know that this quote is taking the mickey about people like that and I know that I am one of those kind of people. I can't just sit there and enjoy my coffee or whatever I am drinking. I have to be always connected.

This begs the question, why do we always have to know what our friends have had for breakfast or what cocktails they consumed the day before? (Instagram)

We waste a lot of time on social media when we don't need to. We really need to get out and meet people in the real world.

What is that people say and joke about? They only post things that show them in the best light. They never post photos of them sitting in a mess on the bedroom floor.

Don't hide behind your screen thinking that you are being social. Guess what? You are not being social. Get up! Get outside! Hell! Get laid even (if you are that way inclined).

Just in case you are wondering, I have now deleted Facebook, Instagram and Twitter from my phone. I haven't deleted the accounts. I can still access them on my laptop. It just means that I can focus on other things when I am sitting on the train, maybe even talk to someone sitting next to me. (They might think I am weird but who cares? That is their thinking, not mine.)

Wednesday 9 May 2018

IS IT PATRIOTISM OR IS IT HATRED? 愛国心?嫌外国心?

Recently in the rugby union world one of the big stories in Australasia at least is of the off-field sort which has caused a lot of controversy.

Israel Folau is a star in three different types of football in Australia, rugby union, rugby league and AFL (Aussie Rules).


He has just recently married one of the stars of New Zealand sport, Maria Tuta'ia.


A few weeks ago, lets say that Israel Folau "divided" opinion by saying that he believed that gay people should go to hell. He suggested because of his christian upbringing that he was taught to think like that.

This divided opinion in that some believed he had the right to express any opinion because he lives in Australia which has free speech while others suggested that it was hate speech and that people who are gay are not gay by choice. You can't control who you are attracted to.

For the record, I am with the side of people who support the gay community as I realise that it is out of the individual's control but I don't believe that it is hate speech. I just think that Folau is a little misguided and should listen to Sir Michael Jones.


I live in Tokyo, Japan and it seems every Sunday I get woken up by "protests" by right wing nationalists. I used to live next to the Russian embassy and now I live next door to the American embassy and as you may expect, those two countries are targets of the right wingers.

I don't have a problem with the person's right to protest, in fact in some cases I wish that both New Zealand and Japan would do it more, like the French. It seems that French people protest at a drop of a hat or am I just stereotyping?

The problem I have with these right wingers is their aggressive hatred of the foreign countries especially China, North and South Korea, Russia and America.

As I said, I have no problem with protesting but when it comes to hatred, that is where I draw the line.



The Japanese word for patriotism is 愛国心 (aikokushin). Lets have a closer look at these characters. The first character () means love. The second character () means country while the last character, () means heart or spirit. So patriotism in Japanese literally means the spirit of love for one's country.

Lets look at this word again, LOVE, COUNTRY etc. Why does patriotism mean to most people to hate other countries? Why have these people turn this around? I don't get it. It is not 嫌外国心(hate foreign country spirit. This is a word that I made up.). It is 愛国心. By all means promote and love the things that make this country great, but what is the point in abusing and yelling and waking us all up under the ruse of 愛国心?

It is all very well having your own opinions and that is great but if you are going to spread hate because of it, that is ridiculous

Don't hide behind the Bible or don't hide behind patriotism. As Sir Michael Jones said look at it through love and respect and guess what, you will get love and respect back。

Tuesday 8 May 2018

F**K IT: LETS DO IT

Have you ever had that "fuck it" moment?

Have you ever had that time in your life when you thought "I'm sick of this shit"?

Have you ever thought to yourself that this whole things "sucks"?

Let me ask you, what did you do about it?


Did you just get stuck in?

Did you, as the logo above suggests "just do it"?

So are you having/had that "fuck this shit" moment?

What are you going to do?

Monday 7 May 2018

Thank you Mark Twain

Here is a great quote from Mark Twain:

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” 


It really is an epiphany for many people when they realise why they have been put on this Earth. "OK, I get it now."

Other things in your life you will have that "aha" moment and you will wonder why you haven't realised that before.

My friend had that "aha" moment a few days ago. For the longest time he was really confused about something that affected him big time but he was telling me recently that he realised why and it all made sense and now he doesn't worry about it and everything is getting back together. His life has turned around and it is going forward in a big way.

Sometimes it takes time to work things out but it doesn't mean that you are stupid or an idiot. What it means is that we all accept information in a different time. We all do not have the same timeline. Maybe it has taken you a long time to work it out. That's fine.

Sunday 6 May 2018

SOME QUOTES FOR TODAY

Here are some quotes from what I call the patron saint or even the godfather of introverts, Susan Cain.

Susan Cain's book, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that can't stop talking has basically started the introvert movement.


"There's zero correlation between the best talker and having the best ideas."


"Don't think of introversion as something that needs to be cured .... Spend your free time the way you like, not the way you think you're supposed to."


"Solitude matters, and for some people, it's the air they breathe."

Saturday 5 May 2018

READ THE ATMOSPHERE

There is a saying in Japanese, KY.

Now I know people in the west will associate KY with stuff you put on when you are having sex but it is a little different.

KY stands for 空気が読めない. (Kuuki ga Yomenai) Get it? KY. Literally it means "Can't read the air."

I'm sure that we have all been guilty of saying stupid things and inappropriate things when we would have been more served saying nothing. The thing is that most of us realise that we have upset the atmosphere and we can apologise and move on, however, there are some who just don't get it and never will.

I remember about 20 years ago, I was in a bar with people from all over the world. An American, who had just arrived in Japan was shouting that he wanted an American to talk to because he didn't understand anyone. A Canadian took him aside and said that that ugly American style wouldn't go down very well in that gathering. To his credit, the American guy took the Canadian's advice and he is still one of my close friends.

He didn't read the air at the start, but now is one guy who reads it better than anyone else.

If you want to read more about this, follow the link below:

https://dailyrbl.blogspot.jp/2016/08/what-we-can-learn-from-ky.html

Friday 4 May 2018

HACKS TO APPEAR MORE CONFIDENT

I'm sure most of you have heard of the phrase, "Fake it until you make it." You know this phrase, right? You "act as if."

What if you are not that confident but you want to act as if you are confident. What kind of things can you do that will make you appear confident even though you might be shitting bricks inside?

Well, there is a few things you can do. Let me go through them that have worked for either myself for other people.


1. POSTURE

How many times in your life has your mother warned you of your posture or that old chestnut "stand up straight. Look the world in the eye." Well, it turned out that she was right. When you throw your shoulders back and walk with your body straight and your head held high, this displays status and power and naturally you are going to appear more confident.

Don't be like the following:


I was leaving the library the other day and there was guy so engrossed in his phone that when he got off the elevator he literally walked into a door.

Forget about your phone for a few minutes and walk straight.


2. KEEP YOUR CHIN AND HEAD UP

Look straight ahead. Don't do as many people do, walk along the street looking at the street. Look straight ahead because that is where you are going and you never know who might be walking the other way.


3. TAKE YOUR HANDS OUT OF OUR POCKETS

Apparently having your hands visible means that you are confident and ready for anything that if you really think about it, is probably correct. My only question is, what if your hands are cold and you don't have any gloves?


4. DON'T FIDGET

One of my annoyances is the guy (and it is usually a guy) who is sitting next to me uncontrollably shaking his leg. What is that all about? From what I have learned, it is confidence issue. It shows that you are worried or anxious about something so if you want to appear confident you firstly have to realise that you are shaking your leg and to control it.


5. EYE CONTACT

This is without a doubt the most important thing to do if you want to appear confident. I know on many an occasion I have locked eyes with a woman and almost immediately turned away. Why? I don't want to be accused of staring when my sudden turning away is showing that (to use a word that is overused recently) I'm a little creepy. Keep those eyes on the person and smile. What's the worst that can happen?


6. TAKE UP SPACE

They say that a confident man takes up space. An example of this if you stand with your feet apart. If you stand with your feet too close together you can come across as timid and anxious. I have noticed a lot when I am sitting on the train that I try to make myself as small as possible so people can sit down next to me. I noticed a biggish woman do the same the other day as well. I don't think this is good. Obviously it is a pain in the arse (ass) for the person sitting next to you but you will look confident.


7. SMILE

One of my favourite menu options on the McDonalds Japan menu is the Smile which is ¥0. I've never ordered one but maybe I should. When you smile a genuine smile, It suggests that you are friendly, trustworthy and honest and this makes you more attractive in anyones's eyes.



8. FIRM HANDSHAKES

My father taught me a long time ago that I had to give a good handshake because that was the first impression that people got of you. You look the other person in the eye and give a firm handshake not a cruncher though like the one below:



9. TAKE BIG STEPS

Walk slower. Don't always seem to be in a hurry. This will convert the feeling that you are in control of your life and you don't need to get anywhere in a hurry. It is all under control.



At the end of the day, do you know what the end goal is?

The end goal is that DGAF confidence. Do you know what DGAF means? My friend and I call it JDGAS.

Why is DGAF so important?

It is important because you have reached a stage where you don't care what people are thinking about you or saying about you. Who cares? It is their opinion and other people are allowed that.

Thursday 3 May 2018

Charisma: How can you cultivate it?

Charisma? What does this mean? The dictionary on my computer defines it this way:

"compelling attractiveness or charm that can inspire devotion in others."

Sounds good, doesn't it? 

Sure, there are some naturally charismatic people out there but you and I who may not be that way inclined can do specific things that help you with you charisma.

What are those things? Lets have a look.

1. Use language that people can understand:

It's all very well having a good vocabulary and it does make you look smart but sometimes using words that are not commonly used may backfire on you. Obviously, don't use language that makes you sound like a dork but keep it simple. Also, if you are listening to someone and they use language that you don't comprehend, don't be afraid to ask what that means. I used to be scared to and then I would look an even bigger dork when it was obvious I didn't understand what was said before.


2. Walk at the same rate as other people:

I had a friend who would walk at her pace which was supersonic speed. I remember one particular time she put on the afterburners and was gone. I was walking with her friend and she and I watched as my friend crossed the horizon. We have lost contact over the years. I wonder if that is a reason. I have found recently that I have slowed down a lot more. I feel great because of it.


3. Allow people to talk about themselves:

They say that people will say to another person that they know him or her very well after they have meet. Why is that? It is because, probably the other person has allowed the other person to talk about themselves so much that they think the other person is great. What do we like more than anything else in the world? Ourselves! Right?


4. It's good to smile:

If you smile more, you appear to be more approachable than the miserable guy in the corner. That's pretty obvious, right? Even if you a not classically attractive, a really nice smile can make up for that in a big way. I've heard that in some countries, Russia for example, to smile is considered childish. I think that is sad. That doesn't make me smile at all.


5. Have a dog:

I'm sorry, this is one thing that I can't agree with. Apparently men with dogs are considered more approachable  and happy and relaxed. Good for them. I'm sorry, I'm scared of dogs. That doesn't work for me.


6. Have open body language:

What do they say? That more than half of your communication is non-verbal and body language related so you really have to concentrate on that. So unfold those arms, open up your torso and you will come across as being very friendly and approachable. (That word seems very topical in this post.)

7. Mirroring

They say that when two people are getting along they start to mirror each other. The person crosses their legs and then you do the same. You take a sip of water and then the other person takes a sip of water. Mirror the other person and they will feel closer to you. That sounds very charismatic to me.

Wednesday 2 May 2018

DEAR MEN ........

Today's post is going to be for men. So, ladies, you can have the day off if you like or you are more than welcome to have a read. That is up to you.


So, guys. How's it going? Are you having a great day? Are you kicking arse (ass)?

You're not?

Well what can you and I do to make our lives better and to become the best version of ourselves?

Number one, understand what is the one thing that makes you, you? What is that one thing that makes you attractive to other people?

If you can cultivate that one thing then you are well on the road to becoming the man that you know deep in your heart that you can be. It can be anything but if you can make that thing a real part of you then you will become more confident and more attractive to women and the other people around you. Maybe they know you so far as a nice guy but not someone that they want to hang with for extended periods of time.

Number two, build a lifestyle that people want to be a part of.

I know that I have been guilty of this and I'm sure that many people out there who are reading this have been guilty of this too, they put off things like hanging with friends, building a career, interacting with family to try and get a woman. When they should be doing these things. They should be concentrating on their career or they should be concentrating on the things that make them who they are and instead of you chasing, if you do it well they will be chasing you.

Build a lifestyle so that men want to be like you and women want to be with you. A cliche I know, but it is true.

Last but not least is number three and this is the need to develop your personality.

What you need to do and this is another cliche I'm sorry, it is to be yourself and to be comfortable with being yourself. Naturally on occasions you may need to step out of shell but the most important is to be comfortable of who you are. That confidence will show out and people will want to be around you.

Remember:


  1. What is one thing that makes you, you?
  2. Build a lifestyle that people want to be a part of.
  3. Develop your personality that is natural to you.

Tuesday 1 May 2018

Why do Brazilian footballers have only one name?

Do you know who Edson Arantes do Nascimento is? Maybe you do.  

What about Ricardo Izecson dos Santos Leite? Does this name ring a bell?

Or, and this is my favourite one, who is Arthur Antunes Coimbra? This one is particularly difficult and unless you google it I doubt you know this one.

Let me put you out of your misery. 

The first name, I am sure sports and particularly football (soccer) fans will know is Pele.



Next, Ricardo Izecson dos Santos Leite. Maybe you have recognised that this is also possibly a Brazilian name and maybe this person is a football player too, Well, you would be correct. This is Kaka. He also played for Brazil from 2002 to 2016. 




Finally, Arthur Antunes Coimbra. Care to guess? Socrates? Ronaldo? Cafu? Hulk? Ronaldinho? Dunga? Drum roll please. (Scroll down to reveal the answer.)




































This is Zico. 



This is one of my earliest memories of the FIFA World Cup. Zico's brilliant goal against the All Whites (New Zealand). 

In Brazilian culture it is not unusual for people to use nicknames as a show of affection. You can see with the above names that you have three or four or more names to remember so the nickname is easier to remember. In the case of the above football players it can almost be considered a brand.

Apparently, even a former president of the country was recognised by his nickname, Lula. 

I think nicknames are good. It makes these players more human and it allows the fans to associate with them better. I hate it when you have to use a title to address someone. Their parents didn't name their children, Your Majesty or Bucho or Mr. President. Why do we need to use that title? I think it is ridiculous. 

I think also having a nickname or a brand or something similar allows you to stand out from the crowd. It allows you to create who you are as opposed to just some faceless person in the crowd.

I wonder if Edson Arantes do Nascimento would have been as well known today if he didn't have the nickname Pele. There is no doubt, but I'm sure that the name Pele added to his aura. 

What are you going to be known as?