Tuesday, 19 June 2018

THANK YOU FOR THE LAST TWO YEARS

Today will be the last day that I will write this blog. I was considering continuing until the end of the month to make it a round 700 number of posts but at the end of the day it is just a number so it doesn't really make any sense.

I would like to thank all of the readers who have taken time to read one of my posts or many of them. It is really nice to see a large number of you and that motivated me to continue with my writing.

I know that some of my opinions are a little controversial and maybe some of you haven't liked what I have written but that is the great thing about the Internet. You can share opinions and you are going to get the odd idiot but basically you can get a good dialogue going with different perspectives from all over the world.

 I would encourage anyone to start a blog. You will find something to write about the more you do it.

From now, I will be concentrating on my two new projects. I have a new blog called The Opposite. You can check it out below:

https://doing-the-opposite.blogspot.com

Also I have my other new project with the situational extrovert. I will be blogging there too.

http://www.situationalextrovert.com

I look forward to seeing you all there.

Thank you again and I hope that our futures are as good as we can make them to be.


Monday, 18 June 2018

MORE CONFIDENCE

How do you become more confident? This question has been on the mind of many people over the years. There are some things you can do. Lets have a look:

1. Focus on you. Focus on improving YOUrself. Don't compare yourself to others. If you start comparing yourself with the rich guy, with the nice car and supermodel wife, you are just going to make yourself more and more depressed. Focus on what you can change. Focus on you and good things will come.

2. I've noticed about people from the two countries I have an affinity with, New Zealand and Japan that both people like to say sorry a lot, I mean more than is normal. I know that there are reasons for that but rather than saying sorry, why don't you say thank you or some other kind of gratitude phrase. Why do you say sorry a lot? Is it because you don't want someone to be angry with you? Use the word sorry sparingly. I know I have done more and more over the years and I feel a lot better for it.

3. This is for you introverts out there, if you don't want to go out. If you don't want to socialise on that particular night, repeat after me "NO". OK? Say it again. "NO."

4. My mother used to tell me off for slouching. I must admit that I still catch myself doing it from time to time. I find when I really concentrating on looking straight ahead with my shoulders back, I do feel more confident and that confidence seems to flow out of me and people notice it.

5. I've just come back from the gym. I feel good. I feel energetic. I feel confident. Enough said.

6. There is an old saying that if someone hasn't got a smile on their face, give them one of yours. I must admit I'm not very good at this but when I do and they smile back, you do feel more confident. Also remember that if you smile and they don't smile back, that is a reflection on them, not you.

7. I've just created a laminated list of what I should be doing on a daily basis. I must admit that the more ticks I mark on the sheet the better I feel. The more I do, the more I can do the next day and the next day and before I know it, things start to happen and you are in a totally different space.

Sunday, 17 June 2018

Get out of the house - Football

Are you are football fan? Will you watching some of the FIFA World Cup of the coming weeks? Or couldn't you give two hoots about it?

Can I suggest to the introverts out there that for at least one game, you get out of the house and watch it with a large group of people.

Yesterday, I went to my local sports bar and watched the Australia v France match. It was such a great atmosphere. I thought that the bar was about 90% French with about 8% Australians.

Both sides sung the national anthem and it was awesome. At the end of the game, I was exhausted with all the visual stimulation going on but it was well worth it.

I'm not a big football fan but the atmosphere and everything else going on made it a lot easier to watch and of course you can have a bit of banter with fans of the differing sides.

Get out of the house during the World Cup, you might enjoy yourself.


Saturday, 16 June 2018

DO WHAT YOU WANT!!!!

A quick post today because I forgot to bring the adapter for my computer and it is at 12% now and I want to post something today.

Oh well. "That will learn you" as someone used to say to me a lot.

It's the weekend and I'm sure you have heard me talk about this ad nauseam. (It's 8% now)

Do what you want, not what you think you should do or what other pressure you into.

Just because it is beautiful outside, doesn't mean that you have to go outside.

Just because it is the weekend, it doesn't mean you have to drink alcohol (I'm going that today though, because I want to.)

DO WHAT YOU WANT

Thursday, 14 June 2018

3 PROBLEMS THAT ALL INTROVERTS HAVE

We all have problems, don't we? Even the people that look like they have their lives together and look like they have everything, also have problems. It's what being a human being is all about, and guess what, if you don't have problems then I would question how you are living your life and whether or not you venture out of the house at all.

Anyway, lets move on to the biggest problems that all introverts have:

1. Wanting to be invited, but not wanting to go anywhere

Of the three problems written here, I can relate to this one the most. Sometimes, you do want to be recognised. Sometimes, you do want that invitation to a night out with the boys or the girls. Sometimes, you do want to have a night out at the bar talking about sports, making money and picking up chicks. However, there are occasions that even though you want these things, you just don't have the energy and going out and talking to a whole bunch of people that you don't know is the worst thing and would just drain you of so much energy.


2. Being lonely at home, but not wanting anyone in your space unless you really like them

Yep, this is another one I can surely relate to. It was very rare and still is to let anyone come to home. I have very rarely had parties at my home and if I ever did, it was only very few. Compare that to my brother who had a big party for his 21st birthday. Sure, I will have close friends or a girlfriend around but not hundreds. Definitely not.


3. And even if you really like them, you want them to go home soon

Friends yes, Girlfriend, No way Jose. I making breakfast for her the next morning.


I found this at the following URL:

https://www.pinterest.jp/pin/251427591678011267/

Wednesday, 13 June 2018

Social Recluse

This article is one of the most interesting I have read. It is about the hikikomori people in Japan. Predominately men, it shows a sad side of society who I believe has failed these people. Basically the hikikomori guys have given a big middle finger to society and have said in their actions that if you don't want what I have to offer, then you can go and get stuffed.

Lets have a look at some of the things written in the article:

1. "According to him, he is a great man and could do extraordinary things, but he does not aways try his best."

OK, if he doesn't try his best then that is 100% his problem but I wonder if he wanted, when he was younger to do things that his parents and immediate peers didn't approve of. I wonder if they tried to force him to change those things. I hope not but it could well be the case.


2. "In Japan, there are always two sides that oppose one another. It is both modern and traditional, bustling and very lonely."

This isn't really connected to hikikomori but it is actually really interesting. My friend has actually mentioned it a few times when he says "Japan is a perfect mix of 1950's and 2050's." He is not far off the mark.

Tokyo can also be a very lonely place. You would think that in a "town" of 15 million people that it would be impossible to get lonely but the opposite is the case. It can be very lonely. You live by yourself. You have few friends. You don't have many hobbies. Maybe you are a little shy. Do you understand what I am saying?


3. "Riki always tries to be outstanding, but has a fear of making mistakes."

Unfortunately, this is a problem in many societies. People are ridiculed for having a go and if they fail they are made fun of, ostracised. It takes a certain type of person to overcome that and it would be easy to go into that state of well if I am going to be made fun of I'm not going to do anything. How do you fix this? I don't know. That's a tough one.


4. "In Japan, where uniformity is still prized, and reputations and outward appearances are paramount, rebellion comes in muted forms, like hikikomori."

Yep, that sums it up. Parents, families want their sons to go to a good university, get a job in a prestigious company or take over their hanko (seal) shop when in fact that son wants to become a dancer or at least try to be. You have a clash right there between the perceived duty and the individualism of the man. So they say "stuff it" I'm going into my room.


5. "The longer the hikikomori remain apart from society, the more aware they become of their social failure."

I couldn't agree with this less. I'm sorry, society has failed them, not the other way around. This is the clash between the 1950's attitude and the 2018 attitude. Encourage them to do something different. Encourage them to fail. It's ok.


6. "Chujo, 24, has been a hikikomori for two years. He has dreams of becoming an opera singer, but as he is the eldest son, his family wants him to join the family business."

See what I mean? That's exactly what I wrote in number 4. He wants to become an opera singer and good luck to him I say but no he is caught between the duty of the family and his own dreams and aspirations so he locks himself up. Nobody is winning here. Everybody is losing.


Unfortunately this problem is not going to go away quickly and with more and more individualistic attitudes spreading, the clash between 1950's and 2018 will continue.

The "sisters" alluded to in this article are great but it is just a band aid. You have to fix the root of the problem and that will take generations.



Tuesday, 12 June 2018

Two "interesting" men (post-script)

Last year I wrote the following post:

https://dailyrbl.blogspot.com/2017/08/an-open-letter-to-two-interesting.html

Today it seems that those two who ten months ago were going to bomb the shit out of each other are now in talks to stop all of that and it is great to see.

The world needs nuclear weapons like it needs a hole in the head and while I am on that subject, don't get me started on nuclear power.

Countries need to follow the New Zealand way, no nukes. By the way that is an unconditional law in New Zealand and it doesn't matter what side of the political spectrum is in power, it is going take some balls for a ruling party to revoke that one.

Anyway, everything looks hunky-dory. For how long? Time will tell I suppose.