The Art of the Compliment

Compliments. Do you like receiving compliments? It is a nice feeling right?

Why don't you try to give a compliment today?

I was sitting at a table in a coffee shop today and a woman sat down opposite me. The first thing I noticed was she had a very nice perfume on and I complimented her on it. She was a little confused. She asked if it was bothering me and I said no it just smells good.

I know that sometimes in this day in age women might think when I pay a compliment like that, that I'm trying to pick them up and they might put their guard up by I generally liked the smell and I wanted to tell her about it.

I think that she was relieved when that is all I said and continued with my work.

The point is I wasn't doing anything dodgy. I paid her a compliment and I felt good about it and she (after a little hesitation) felt good about it too.

So when you practice the art of the compliment what should you do?

1. Make sure that your compliment is genuine. Make sure that it isn't something generic. (My friend likes to call it "generic shit.")

2. Why don't you pay a compliment to someone which isn't obvious that not a lot of people might notice.

3. Focus on achievements not the physical things. For example a guy telling a beautiful woman "your eyes are gorgeous" may not come across as sincere because she has probably heard it a million times before. However, saying that you enjoyed her blog post will really make her happy. I know I like it when someone pays me a compliment about my blog posts.

4. Don't overdo the compliment. It will be very obvious. Do it casually. Like most things it is not what you say it is how you say it and if you over do it then you are going to come across as very fake.

5. Above all make it sincere and make the compliment sound like you do it all the time. You pay compliments everyday and that it is no big deal. If the receiver has a problem with that, it is his or her problem. It has nothing to do with you because you have paid the compliment sincerely and that is all you can do.

Go out and pay someone a compliment today. The more you do it the easier it will become.