Wednesday, 7 September 2016

Tony Robbins' Human Needs: Significance

This is the need to be special and worthy of attention. It is about being important and feeling acknowledged for something we have done or achieved.

A good example of this would be Facebook. This is because we like to see how many likes we will get for content or how many people will comment on it. I must admit that when I change my profile picture and 50 people like it, it does feel pretty good. Although this is not a great indicator of things as I remember a guy from my gym explaining to me about the rules of the internet. His explanation went something like this:

"Ugly or not so good looking guy or girl says they have discovered the cure for cancer. Maybe they will get a couple of likes and a comment. Handsome guy or extremely hot woman says they they ate an apple and farted. They will get 500 likes and 50 comments." 

In the grand scheme of things, which one is more significant but which one has their need for significance fulfilled?

What are ways to gain that significance in a positive way?

1. You could dress differently to everyone else. This way it draws attention to you and you feel more significant as a result. In the mid-2000's there was a theory called peacocking in which guys would dress up in outrageous costumes to get the attention of women. Here is an example:

2. Some people like to perform. They might like to perform on stage or even make a Youtube video or two. This probably explains why I like to speak in public as it gives me significance. I like it and it energises me when people laugh at my jokes.

3. Being recognised by your peers is one way to gain significance. For example when you are the top salesperson in your organisation this will make you feel good about life and push you on to bigger and better things. The same could be said about the Academy Awards. To us mortals it seems like a big waste of money and we might be right but to the people in the movie industry it is a great honour. And you get to see speeches like this one.

Another one of my favourite speeches is this one.

Of course there are negative ways to build significance:

1. When you sleep with a whole bunch of different people, you are building significance in a negative way. You are just trying to show that you are THE MAN or WOMAN to your peers.

2. Bullying is a sign of trying to get significance in a negative way. By bullying someone, the bully feels a lot better about themselves.

3. Committing a crime so that you can buy something great is a way of gaining significance. I watched a movie recently about a bunch of British criminals on the Costa Del Sol in Spain who used their drug runs and the like to gain significance in the movie.
Also criminals may tell people about what they do because it makes them feel good about it.

4. Animal abuse is a sign that he or she wants significance.

We all want to be important. We all want our lives to have some kind of meaning. Imagine coming to your death bed and and thinking what have you achieved. We really need our lives to matter somehow.

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