Thursday, 3 November 2016

The differences between extroverts and introverts

I saw this article in The Huffington Post the other day. It is an excellent article and shows the difference between introverts and extroverts.

Lets go through each of them and I will give you my take on them.

1. Extroverts recharge by being social/Introverts recharge by being alone

Yes, this is pretty much Introvert/Extrovert 101. I have said it here ad nauseam, Extroverts need a crowd and introverts need to be alone. When you are an ambivert it depends on how you are feeling at the time and you need to listen to yourself so as not to overdo it and then you may need to go back into your cocoon for a few days.

You could be like this (I have no idea who these people are):

Or you could be like this:

Doesn't he look relaxed and recharged?

2. Extroverts enjoy group conversations/Introverts enjoy one-on-one conversations

Extroverts like to be the centre of attention. They like a crowd that they can perform to. Introverts like the one-on-one situation where they can express themselves freely with someone that they trust and that they can talk about more in-depth topics than the usual.

3. Extroverts have more friends but the bonds are less strong/Introverts have closer relationships with a few friends

I always find it interesting when I'm talking with an extrovert and they will use the word "friend" quite liberally. "My friend does this." "My friend did that." Personally, I don't like the overuse of the word friend. A friend is someone special. A friend is someone who will help you out when it is 3am on a Tuesday morning in the middle of a snowstorm. A friend is not someone you met at a party for five minutes while you were half cut.

While on that note, please don't use this sentence "He's (She's) just a friend." By saying this, you are trivialising the word friend. "He's (She's) JUST a friend." What do you mean, JUST? Friends and friendship are some of the most important concepts in our lives. Don't trivialise it by saying JUST. By saying that word you are saying that he or she is not important in your life. But he or she is your friend, you said it.

4. Extroverts speak more/Introverts listen more

Apparently this is true. I've been told that I am a terrible listener which is kind of true. I hear what the other person is saying but I don't listen. I'm either thinking about what I'm going to say (waiting to talk) or I'm thinking about something completely different and have no idea what they have said. Not good. What do people say? We were given two ears and only one mouth for a reason.

5. Extroverts easily accept change/Introverts struggle with change

This is one that I'm not really sure about because I'm sure that I am resistant to change but I can't think of any concrete examples. I am reminded of this cartoon though. We all want change, but we are reluctant to change ourselves because that will take us out of our comfort zones and that is not the way we want to live our lives. We want to go through our lives with the least possible hassle.

6. Extroverts get distracted easily/Introverts can focus for a long time

This one proves that we are all not one or the other. This one proves that we all have introverted characteristics and we all have extroverted characteristics. In us all, one side is more than the other. I easily get distracted. I'm writing this blog post in a library and for whatever reason I am totally distracted. Every person who walks past I have to stop what I am doing and look and see who they are.

7. Extroverts are more open/Introverts are more reserved

This is very true. An extrovert will gladly go up and talk to someone with out worrying too much about whether or not they will strike out or not. They think that they are making the other person's day by saying hi and if they get told to go away they will look for someone else to say hi to. Introverts don't do this as much. In fact they will not say much at all which leads to the misunderstanding that introverts are shy which is very far from the truth. Go to this post to find out the difference.

8. Extroverts open up to anyone/Introverts open up to a few people

I remember a few years ago a guy said to me that he thought that I was a bit strange when he first met me. He said that I appeared a bit standoffish at first. I said that that was perfectly normal for me because I did not know him and that I didn't know how much I should tell him about myself and how much I could trust him. I had to be a little bit careful and then when I felt comfortable I was able to open up.

9. Extroverts make decisions quickly/Introverts reflect before making decisions. 

I am one person who tends to take too long over my decisions and when I have decided the opportunity is lost. There needs to be a middle ground between the two. Extroverts need to take just a little bit longer with their decisions while introverts need to make the leap just a fraction earlier than they naturally want to.

10. Extroverts love getting attention/Introverts are not interested in getting attention

I tell you something, this introvert loves getting attention. This introvert loves getting on stage and thriving off the energy of people listening and watching. Of course, if this introvert doesn't get any reaction from the audience then it can go downhill very quickly indeed.

11. Extroverts are fine working in open spaces/ Introverts like working in quiet spaces

As I write this, I am writing this at a library. Not a public library mind you but a space where people can go to do work. It is relatively quiet but there are still a good number of people sitting around. I do however have earphones on listening to music and even though I am in a public space I'm still in my own little world.

12. Extroverts speak up in meetings/Introverts share ideas when prompted

This one is very true in my opinion. Extroverts like the attention and even if their ideas are not the best they will still tell everyone within earshot their ideas and be very disappointed if they are not taken up upon. An introvert can have very good ideas but occasionally they are not able to articulate those ideas very well and because of this their ideas may not be adopted because of the presentation of the idea instead of the idea itself.

Al Gore wasn't listened to in Congress because he didn't present his idea very well to a bunch of extroverted congresspeople. This is why he had to make the movie, An Inconvenient Truth. Extroverted people will sit up and listen to a movie but they won't listen to someone who may be quietly spoken and not very exciting.

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