What if you are not that confident but you want to act as if you are confident. What kind of things can you do that will make you appear confident even though you might be shitting bricks inside?
Well, there is a few things you can do. Let me go through them that have worked for either myself for other people.
1. POSTURE
How many times in your life has your mother warned you of your posture or that old chestnut "stand up straight. Look the world in the eye." Well, it turned out that she was right. When you throw your shoulders back and walk with your body straight and your head held high, this displays status and power and naturally you are going to appear more confident.
Don't be like the following:
I was leaving the library the other day and there was guy so engrossed in his phone that when he got off the elevator he literally walked into a door.
Forget about your phone for a few minutes and walk straight.
2. KEEP YOUR CHIN AND HEAD UP
Look straight ahead. Don't do as many people do, walk along the street looking at the street. Look straight ahead because that is where you are going and you never know who might be walking the other way.
3. TAKE YOUR HANDS OUT OF OUR POCKETS
Apparently having your hands visible means that you are confident and ready for anything that if you really think about it, is probably correct. My only question is, what if your hands are cold and you don't have any gloves?
4. DON'T FIDGET
One of my annoyances is the guy (and it is usually a guy) who is sitting next to me uncontrollably shaking his leg. What is that all about? From what I have learned, it is confidence issue. It shows that you are worried or anxious about something so if you want to appear confident you firstly have to realise that you are shaking your leg and to control it.
5. EYE CONTACT
This is without a doubt the most important thing to do if you want to appear confident. I know on many an occasion I have locked eyes with a woman and almost immediately turned away. Why? I don't want to be accused of staring when my sudden turning away is showing that (to use a word that is overused recently) I'm a little creepy. Keep those eyes on the person and smile. What's the worst that can happen?
6. TAKE UP SPACE
They say that a confident man takes up space. An example of this if you stand with your feet apart. If you stand with your feet too close together you can come across as timid and anxious. I have noticed a lot when I am sitting on the train that I try to make myself as small as possible so people can sit down next to me. I noticed a biggish woman do the same the other day as well. I don't think this is good. Obviously it is a pain in the arse (ass) for the person sitting next to you but you will look confident.
7. SMILE
One of my favourite menu options on the McDonalds Japan menu is the Smile which is ¥0. I've never ordered one but maybe I should. When you smile a genuine smile, It suggests that you are friendly, trustworthy and honest and this makes you more attractive in anyones's eyes.
8. FIRM HANDSHAKES
My father taught me a long time ago that I had to give a good handshake because that was the first impression that people got of you. You look the other person in the eye and give a firm handshake not a cruncher though like the one below:
9. TAKE BIG STEPS
Walk slower. Don't always seem to be in a hurry. This will convert the feeling that you are in control of your life and you don't need to get anywhere in a hurry. It is all under control.
At the end of the day, do you know what the end goal is?
The end goal is that DGAF confidence. Do you know what DGAF means? My friend and I call it JDGAS.
Why is DGAF so important?
It is important because you have reached a stage where you don't care what people are thinking about you or saying about you. Who cares? It is their opinion and other people are allowed that.
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