#SANDPAPERGATE

In the last week or so, one of the biggest news stories, no, the biggest news story coming out of Australia was the #Sandpapergate scandal involving the Australian cricket team.

For non-cricket fans, you are probably not going to have heard of this so let me give you my best summary of what happened.

In cricket, you are allowed to shine the ball to allow it to move in the air when it is bowled (pitched) to the batsman. When the ball gets older it then can reverse swing (please don't ask). Have a look at the video below which will give you a better idea of what it is.

In this saga, there were three protagonists. They were Steve Smith, the Australian captain, David Warner, the Australian vice-captain and Cameron Bancroft, a new guy in the team that from memory was playing his 8th test match.

Basically, the three people just mentioned, cooked up a plan to get an advantage over the opposition by altering the state of the ball. It is called ball tampering and it is illegal and considered cheating in the world of cricket.

From what I can understand from this story, Warner asked Bancroft to use sandpaper on the ball, this with the permission of Smith the captain. Teams have been doing this for years but through extenuating circumstances this whole thing was made into something that was a lot bigger than what it would normally be.

Basically, the Australians would be considered the bully boys of international cricket. They play the game hard and they always want to win. (So far, so good, right?) However, like most bullies, they like to dish it out but some in particular don't like it when it is given back to them. They tell the opposition that they have crossed the line even though, to paraphrase Joey Tribbiani from Friends, "You are so past the line. The line is a dot to you."

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So what happened in the dressing room of the Australian team on that day?

I'm just imagining here and what I have read online and in newspapers. David Warner came up with the idea to tamper with the ball. Because he is one of the top players and vice-captain, he recruited his  new team mate Cameron Bancroft to do the deed? Why? Because he is a new member of the team and not so well known, they thought that he wouldn't attract much attention.

My question here is was Cameron Bancroft bullied into basically cheating by his superiors in the team?

I would say probably not. Because Bancroft is just a new player and looking to make his mark in the team and in international cricket and when a senior player comes up to him of course he is going to say yes. I know I would. I would probably think that it is wrong and I'm sure Bancroft probably thought the same thing but he went ahead with it so that he could be seen to be doing the right thing for the team. I can understand that completely.

What can we learn from this?

Well, both Cameron Bancroft and I should be able to say "no" when we are faced with a situation that we are not comfortable with. I know that I have said "yes" in the past when I really wanted to say "no." Many people say "yes" just to fit in and to not seem like a nuisance. If we learn how to say "no" then our life can become easier and we can live according to our morals and also personality.

As an introvert, I know the times I can go to parties and the times when I can not. I can say "no" these days when in the past I couldn't and maybe Cameron Bancroft will learn this as he grows as a cricketer and a person.

I hope that he comes back to test cricket a better player and a better person. He is very talented (he wouldn't be in the team if he wasn't) and if he can come back half as well as Mohammad Amir then he will be doing very well.

Learn to say no. I'm learning too.

SOME QUOTES FOR THE INTROVERTED MIND

If you are anything like me, you will do a lot of reading about famous people, about how to improve yourself and how to create your best self.

In some of those books you do come across some interesting quotes from time to time. Let me share some with you.


"Quiet people have the loudest minds." - Stephen Hawking

The first one is from the late Stephen Hawking. Do you know what, he is 100% completely correct. I know from my own experience that my mind is forever on thinking about things. Thinking about different scenarios. Recently, I have been doing a lot of visualising. It is working believe me. I would suggest it for anyone out there.

"Don't think of introversion as something that needs to be cured... Spend your free time the way you like, not the way you think you're supposed to." - Susan Cain

Yes, once again, I completely agree with this also. Susan Cain is as I would describe her, the patron saint of introverts. I agree that you shouldn't cure it. You are who you are after all. However what I disagree with is that sometimes you have to come out of your shell and be the party person on occasions.


"An introvert may feel asocial when pressured to go to a party that doesn't interest her. But for her, the event does not promise meaningful interaction. In fact, she knows that the party will leave her feeling more alone and alienated." - Laurie Helgoe

Introverts out there, I'm sure you have all been pressurised into going to a party that you didn't really want to go to and a five hour party seemed like five years. I know I have been pressurised on a number of occasions. I know it is hard to say no to friends but if they are true friends they won't worry about it and they will respect your request for a 'quiet night in' which for your extroverted friends is the equivalent of hell.

Why do I have to drink coffee?

Coffee! It seems to be the holy water of western society. If you don't drink coffee, you are not part of the in-crowd. If you don't drink coffee there must be something wrong with you.

You have probably recognised already that I don't drink coffee and in fact I don't like it. We have some pretty weird food preferences in our society and did you know the most expensive coffee in the world comes from the droppings of some South East Asian cat creature? All I can say with that is WTF? I can imagine all the people who think that they are sophisticated (whatever that means) and think they are the bees knees falling over themselves to get to that cup of coffee just so that they can be seen and have their photo taken so that they can put it on Instagram. Look at it me, I'm drinking cat shit coffee.

Apparently the cats nowadays because the coffee has become trendy (see my above comment) farmers are battery farming the cats. Oh well, what you don't know won't hurt you I suppose as long as I am seen to be trendy. That's all that matters.

My point today is that why do I have to drink coffee to be considered sociable? What is it about coffee that it is suddenly become this thing that you have to have to show to other people that you are cool. I don't get.

Just drink what you like. Who cares? If you like drinking that cheap beer, drink it. Who cares? The beer snobs can have those expensive craft beers all to themselves.

What can we learn from the 'Voice of Cricket'?

As some of you will know I grew up playing cricket in my school days and for a few years after. Believe it or not, cricket is one of the most popular sports in the world. I've heard that it could be number two in the world after football (soccer). (Thank you India.)

Because cricket goes on for as long as 5 days, the whole television coverage has to be on point and some of the commentators can become as famous as some of the players.

One of the famous commentators was Richie Benuad. Benaud was a player in the 1950's and 1960's and become a commentator after that. He basically followed the sun by working in England and Australia and few would argue that he was the voice of cricket.

Richie Benaud had a small list of rules for his cricket commentary that could easily be transferred to any part of life.

1. Never ask for a statement

2. Remember the value of a pause. Think before you blurt out anything.

3. There are no two teams in the world called 'we' or 'they'.

4. Avoid cliches and banalities such as 'he's hit that to the boundary', 'he won't want to get out now', 'of course, as you can see on the screen'. 

5. The Titanic was a tragedy, the Ethiopian drought a disaster, and neither bears any relation to a dropped catch. So true. You have to put everything into perspective.

6. Put your brain into gear before opening your mouth. Think before you speak. This is related to number 2.

7. Concentrate fiercely at all times. I believe that this is all about focus. You have to be focused on what you are working on. I lost focus recently and it cost me a lot.

8. Above all, don't take yourself too seriously and have fun. I think that this one is the most important. If life can't be fun.

Rest In Peace Richie Benaud.

P.S. I'm sure that Richie would have been disgusted by what happened in Cape Town over the weekend. Not a good look for Australian cricket.

IS IT OUR FAULT?

In 2018, is it always the guy's fault?

That's an interesting question. In relationships, is it always the guy's fault that they broke up.

Part of me thinks yes and and part of me thinks no.

Well Blair, which one is it?

Since I am a guy, I would suggest that, yes the guy has to take the responsibility ..... unfortunately.

I hear some of you screaming out there what if the woman cheats on the guy? Well, maybe the guy wasn't looking after the woman well enough.

It's a complicated one, isn't it? There is so many variables involved, emotions, feelings, money, children, possessions. I am probably just scratching the surface when I make that list.

I read or heard somewhere recently that 75% of the time it is the woman that instigates the breakup. If this is true then maybe, yes it is always the guy's fault.

I suppose in today's society we have so many options. We have Tinder and Bumble and Hinge and one that sounds very interesting, Happn. Also you have the old classics like Match.com or OK Cupid.  All of these options make it seem like there is a real smorgasbord out there of dating options and it would mean that people are deciding for whatever reason that there must be something better and they will drop who they are with. I think these kind of people are setting themselves up for disaster but that is their prerogative.

The only advice I could give you guys out there is be the best version of yourself because no one else will. If that isn't good enough, that isn't your problem.

Hikikomori - Is it the individual's problem?

 https://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2018/03/21/national/social-issues/japans-older-hikikomori-live-isolation-shunning-society-years/#.WrRj8maB3aY

The above is a very interesting article that I read in The Japan Times this week. It reminded me of a blog post that I wrote about 18 months ago.

In this post I talked about the hikikomori phenomenon in Japan. (Please click on the link to read the article.)

I'm sorry, my mind hasn't changed about what the problem is and it isn't the individual who has decided that they are going to spend their days locked away in their room. The problem is society and I'm not going to blame the individual at all.

We need to teach ourselves that it is OK to think differently to other people. We need to teach ourselves that it is OK to think outside of the box. We need to teach ourselves that those kind of people have minds that could quite well solve all of society's problems. Want a cure for cancer? It might well be in that mind that has locked themselves in the room because you decided that he should CONFORM?

What does conform mean anyway?

The dictionary on my computer says that Conform means to behave according to socially acceptable conventions or standards. Who decides what is socially acceptable? Who makes these rules and why can't we break them? Is it because it makes you feel uncomfortable? Does it make you feel inadequate? Stop beating the creativity out of people just because you can't understand it. Who gives you the right to do something like that?

Sure, hikikomori is a problem but how much is it costing the country? Probably a lot. A lot of moolah.

If you meet someone with far out ideas, embrace it. Ask questions. Query them. Praise them. Whatever you do, don't dismiss them because you could be dismissing them from society which is not great for anyone.

AGE IS BUT A NUMBER

I saw the following quote on Instagram recently:

If you're 17 with a huge YouTube channel, awesome.

If you're 25 and you're a new mom, fantastic.

If you're 36 and changing careers, great.

If you're 45 and starting a biz, super.

There is no age limit to being successful AND there is no single definition of success.

This quote is by Melanie Chisnall. You can see her Twitter handle below:

https://twitter.com/ImagineYouZA

It sums it up doesn't it? Some people have like a shopping list of things that they want to have done.

• Degree by 21
• Married by 25
• First child by 28
• Managerial position by 30
• First house by 33
• Holiday home by 45
• Boss of the company by 53
• Retire at 65

I don't know about you but that looks absolutely boring and it might work for some people but are they happy? I mean really happy. 

They slowly tick off these things one by one but we all mature and come into our own at different times. I would have loved to have started a multi-million dollar business at the age of 21 but I didn't even know what business was then and my biggest decision was to decide what flavour popcorn to buy at the movie theatre on a Saturday night. 

Age is but a number. Please remember that.