Friday, 1 June 2018

Things that Introverts hate to hear

If you identify yourself as being an introvert, there is probably a number of things that you have heard of a regular basis. Lets go through some of them now:

"You're so quiet."

This is one thing that really gets my goat. Some people, usually extroverts expect other people to be talking all the time. They expect scintillating conversation about some boring topic that is cool but doesn't advance the intellectual capabilities of either party so when an introvert doesn't have anything to say about the Kardashians, they are considered quiet.

"Why don't you ever want to go out?"

When people suggest going out on a Friday or Saturday night, it is usually to a noisy bar or nightclub where people shout at each other and have those annoying small talks that introverts love so much. (Note the sarcasm.) Extroverts just don't understand that introverts can't handle all of these stimulation. It is too much. They are drained of energy very quickly.

"You're just shy."

Not talking much does not equal shy. Not talking much means that he or she has nothing to say. They can't contribute to the conversation very well at all. When I went to the bar or nightclub I was told that I was shy. I wouldn't approach women. What the problem was I could't hear what the woman was saying. The environment was so stimulating that it was just not a good situation for me and also the fact that I couldn't bullshit (small talk) meant that my success rate at those places was minimal.

"Why do you spend so much time alone?"

Introvertism 101 = introverts energise by either being alone or with one other person or in a small group. Any other questions?

"You should socialise more."

By socialise, you mean what? Believe it or not, everyone is different on this piece of rock hurtling through space at 107,000 km/h. What does socialise mean? With social media we can all socialise by using those different apps now. For example, interacting on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, hey even Tinder and Bumble. Also, socialising doesn't mean meeting up at the local bar for a few brews with some mates. For some people that might mean socialise but for introverts it can mean having two of their closest friends over for dinner. That's socialising, isn't it? Or do you need to be a loud venue with 500 people?

"Are you ok? Why are you so quiet?"

"I'm ok. Are you ok?"

I don't get this one. Just because you are not spending you entire life talking the ear off the people around you. It doesn't mean that you are sick or ill or bad in any way.

As they say, Silence is Golden.

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