Team sports? Individual sports?

I first started playing organised sport when I was 7 or 8. In the summer I would play cricket and in the winter I would play football (soccer). At that time I was undoubtedly less outgoing than I am now so I wonder why I chose to play a team sport as opposed to an individual sport. It's a mystery, I know. Now, I would classify myself as a bit of an ambivert while then I was definitely an introverted child.

Why didn't I choose an individual sport? Well, I believe that there are three reasons for that.

The first reason would be family. In New Zealand, traditionally the four popular sports would be rugby union, rugby league, netball and cricket. As you would probably know all of these are team sports. My family like cricket and rugby. In fact my father was coach of one of the top high school cricket teams for a number of years. Ironically my brother is the coach of the same team now. I remember going along to watch my father play cricket every Saturday so that was why I chose that sport even though I am sure that my parents would have supported me even if I had decided to play underwater tiddly winks.

The second reason would be friends. At primary school, my best friend was Ieuan. I was in the same football team as Ieuan until in our first year of middle school he decided to go and play field hockey. Of course you like to hang out with your friends, so the following year, I decided to go and play field hockey. In Japan, where I am living at the moment there is an after school, school called juku. For English speakers it would be known as cram school. Why do children in Japan want to go to juku? Is it because they want to get into an exclusive school or is it because the parents want it? I don't think that it is either of these things. Well in some cases maybe but in most cases I would say that it gives the children more opportunities to hang out with their friends.

The third reason would be television. When I was a child, you could watch, rugby, cricket and football. That was about it. We didn't have cable television and there wasn't much of a chance to watch other sports. When the Olympics rolled around then we could watch minor sports like equestrian or canoeing or rowing. However, when the Olympics were over, one month later we would forget about these sports as we watched what was going on in the rugby.

It is because of these three reasons I believe that I chose teams sports over an individual sport. I'm in my 40's now and I have basically given up team sports and I do Crossfit. Crossfit is done in a group but it is basically an individual sport. My father, who is 64 is really into his golf. Before he took up golf seriously he played lawn bowls. Lawn bowls is played individually or in a small team. So maybe as we get older we try introverted sports.

Anyway, whatever you do give it 100%. I was very half-assed at some stages and I regret that now. Even now I don't really give Crossfit 100%. Whether you do team sports or individual sports, give it your all and the results you get will be great. Your self confidence will go up and you will feel so much better about yourself.

Just in case you don't know what lawn bowls is. Here is a video from youtube:

To go out or to stay in?

Yesterday I introduced the book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a world that won't stop talking. This book is about introverts. Most of you probably know the antonym of introvert and that would be extrovert. But let me introduce you to a word that might not be in your vocabulary. That is the word ambivert.

If an introvert is someone who gets power from being alone or with a small group, then an extrovert is someone who gets power from being at a party or with a large group.

So what is an ambivert? From what I can tell, an ambivert is someone who is happy in either situation. They can go to the party or they are equally happy staying at home and watching a DVD.

So, what are you? Do you need to be around a lot of people or do you need the space to be alone or with your closest friend?

For introverts don't feel pressured that you have to go out and be the life of the party. Look after yourself. You want that down time to refresh.

For extroverts, don't feel like the introvert in your life is offending you when they reject your invitation this weekend. They are not rejecting you. In fact when they say no, it hasn't really got anything to do with you at all, they just need that time to relax and be alone with their thoughts. Go out and have a great time. You will find that you don't need your introverted friend anyway to have a good time because you can chat with and make friends easily anyway.

Have a good weekend and just do what you want to do and I'm sure you will have a great time. Thank god it's Friday!

I'll stay in tonight

About three years ago I was in a library and I came across this book.

This is a book about introverts and how we live in an extroverted world and the people who don't shout out tend to be left behind because maybe they can't put across their views and opinions as well as someone who is a bit more extroverted and "out there."

It was a very interesting book and it opened my eyes to why I am like am. For example one of the stories that the author, Susan Cain told was about an introvert giving a speech or a presentation. I've always thought of myself as being a competent public speaker and unlike most people it doesn't freak me out and I have had the experience of speaking to over 1000 people in both English and Japanese and it turned out to be fine. In fact, that interesting part was, I was more nervous after the speech than before. Strange, eh? The reason I found out from this book was that, because I was so far out of my comfort zone in front of all of these people, I felt so drained of energy at the end of it that I had to run away and be by myself for a few moments. This in a nutshell is the difference between an introvert and an extrovert.

An introvert gets energy from being either alone in solitude or with one or two other people while an extrovert has to be surrounded by a lot of people, being the centre of attention, partying the night away, charming the people around her or him.

This book really showed me the differences and why people are why they are like that. Even my friend and I had a eureka moment where we both understood why he would want to go out on the town, where I was rather reluctant, shall we say.

It is really interesting once you realise who and what you are as you can stop playing a character you may have been playing up until now just to fit in with the people around you. You can reject that invitation for the fifth party in five days because you may want some time alone to relax and think in solitude. Also it helps you interact with people around you as you know why they do what they do.

I suggest having a read of the above book, whether you are extroverted or introverted. You may learn a thing or two about yourself. I know I did.

Tokyo Stopover

Here is the scenario, you are in Tokyo, Japan on a business trip or you have a few days layover. You don't know anyone except your business contacts in Tokyo. What do you do? How are you going to spend your few days off? What do you want to do? Do you want to do what the guide books says or do you want to do what your Kiwi guide says?

Below are ten ideas I can give you that you can do in and around Tokyo, Japan that they might not talk about in the books but once you make the decision to go you will be happy you did.

1. Go to a public bath. For first timers this can seem weird and even a little daunting but I assure you after the initial shock of naked people walking around, you will love it. I took my cousin a few years ago and he said in the changing room that it was the most bizarre thing that he was about to do in his life. Two minutes later he thought that it was really cool and thought out loud whether something like it would take off in his home town in New Zealand.

2. Take a couple of hours and go to Kappabashi. This is only a five to ten minute walk from Asakusa that I'm sure all of the guide books will say to go to. Kappabashi is the area where you can find all of the fake food. The samples, the displays outside restaurants that show you what is on the menu. They have all sorts of other things too but the sample shops seem plentiful. Be warned though, they are available to buy but can be quite expensive.

3. Go to Tsukishima. This is a man-made island near Ginza that serves monjayaki. This is sort of the local food of the area and I won't lie to you in some cases it looks like that someone has vomited on the hot plate. I assure you that it is very delicious and most of the shops are small so you can really get to know the other customers. My father thought it was the highlight of his trip interacting with the locals.

4. Shoben Yokocho. This is translated as Piss Alley and the reason is that there is only one toilet for the whole street. Now, this is probably in your guide books but it is really cool and like Tsukishima you can interact quite intimately with the locals.

5. Maid Cafes. I have only been to one of these once and it was an interesting experience. For what it is, it is quite expensive for average food at the best and you get to see young women dressed up as maids treating you like you have come home after a long day at work. There is no sexual element to this besides the people who have that kind of fetish and it is a subculture of the Akihabara area of Tokyo where you can buy any kind of electronic equipment that you can think of.

6. If you are in Tokyo during summer I suggest going down to the Shonan coast. It is about one hour out of Tokyo and it is where Tokyoites go to cool off in the Pacific Ocean. Please don't expect the water to be pristine and have golden sand on the beaches. They are packed and the water can be dirty but the interesting thing is that they have, dotted along the beaches tents called umi no ie. These are places that you go and sit down, have a beer, eat something, hire boogie boards and even have a shower. Some of them can be quite elaborate and will have events during the summer like salsa dancing and DJs.

7. If you are into sports and you are from a Commonwealth country I suggest you take in a professional baseball game. For cricket loving people you may not understand the strategies but the actual premise of the game is quite simple, try and score more runs than the opposition. Easy.

8. For those cricket players a trip to the local baseball batting centre would be fun for you. Just like facing a bowling machine you get lots of 20 balls thrown at you and you have to try and hit a home run. It is a lot of fun and you can challenge yourself at 150 clicks. I tell you after facing that my wagon wheel would look like I had hit all of my runs either through all over the slips. Some people out there would suggest that that is my reality anyway, so what is different?

9. Spend a night in a izakaya. These are one of the places in Japan where everyone can really wind down and have a few beers and something to eat. The food is usually shared and some of the places have great variety. My friends love them.

10. The last one is going to be on page one of all the guide books but this is my reason for going to this attraction. Tokyo Disneyland. Yes, you heard me correctly, Tokyo Disneyland. This is a great place and it is a type of place that adults should go at least once in their lives. It is a chance for you to be a child again. To throw away those adult inhibitions and insecurities and just be a kid again.

There it is, 10 places to see in and around Tokyo. There are others I have left out but you can always do your own research for places that you like and explore them.

Have fun!!!

Never, never, never give up. Thank you Winston.

The godfather of the self-development genre is arguably Napoleon Hill. Napoleon Hill's most well known book is Think and Grow Rich published in 1937. Most of the self-help "gurus" cite this work as a big influence in their work. People like Anthony Robbins and Brian Tracy have been influenced by this book.

I was reading the chapter yesterday on Persistence. Persistence is very important in anything you do and without it you are going to be up the proverbial creek without a paddle.

One of the first things that struck me was that persistence can sometimes be misunderstood for ruthless and cold-blooded behaviour. That is so true. When we observe someone trying to get what they want we look at it from our rose tinted glasses and we think what an idiot, when in fact we should be applauding these people for going after exactly what they want.

The second thing I noticed is that the lack of persistence is a real weakness in most of us. Napoleon Hill says that this can be overcome by effort. I must admit that this blog has required a lot of persistence. They have been a few times over the last 38 days that I have seriously thought about why I am doing this and whether I should continue with this challenge especially when there hasn't been any obvious things to blog about. Napoloen Hill says however that the starting point of all achievement is desire and my desire is to beat a friend of mine who is also blogging daily as well. We are keeping each other going. This is my Master Mind if you like. Another one of Hill's suggestions in his book.

If you attain the habit of persistence, Hill says that you can never fail because it will always allow you to stand up and go again and that is the secret isn't it? Stand up and go again. It is just a temporary defeat.

What really struck a cord with me about this chapter yesterday was the list of the symptoms of lack of persistence and the last one was fear of criticism. People won't do things for the fear of being criticised by people around them. Usually this just exists in our mind and it isn't a physical fear like jumping out of an airplane for example. I mean, you will never see me jump out of an airplane because it scares the sh*t out of me. However if I advertise my blog, what's going to happen? Let me think about that for awhile. Well, some people might actually read it. That's good isn't it? What am I scared of? Also, I'm providing content for the internet. I'm a producer as opposed to a user. That's good too, isn't it?

We are scared to take chances because of the fear of criticism when in fact rather than criticising, we should be congratulating them.

There is a little story in the chapter about Wallis Simpson and her persistence to get what (or who) she wanted. So she should have been congratulated too, but I'm sure that wasn't the case in 1930's Britain. I wonder what would have happened and how history would have changed if King Edward VIII stayed on as king. They should make a movie about that like this movie:

If you know what you want and want it enough then don't give up. Go after it because you can't lose and the people who doubt you and criticise you will suddenly be on your side.

Good Morning!

I would like to talk to you about the Miracle Morning and give you an update about how I'm going. It has only been a few days so I must admit that it isn't an ingrained habit yet but it has been an interesting exercise.

For those of you who don't know, recently I read the book that is pictured below:

It suggests that you start your day with a structured routine. To kick start your daily activities to get a head-start on the day. The author got up at 5am and did a few things that allowed him to get his life back on track.

The author, Hal Elrod introduced his system called SAVERS which is 6 things to do in the morning to really give you a lift.

I am following this system and so far so good. I must admit that I have missed the 5am wake up call a couple of times but only by a few minutes. So I would be starting at about 5.15am which isn't too bad if you think about it.

The six activities I am following are:

Meditation
Affirmations
Visualisation
Exercise
Reading
Journalling

I am thinking of bringing thinking time (or as it is popularly known as, TT) into my system. This will only add another 15 minutes or so to the daily routine.

What are the good things and the not so good things that I have found out about the Miracle Morning?

Lets start with the good things shall we:

1. It is allowing me to do things that I might not want to make time for during the day. The examples of these are the meditation, affirmations and visualisation. These can be hard work because you for all intents and purposes are just sitting there doing nothing which is quite difficult, believe me.

2. Journalling has become a daily habit. This is a chance to get all of your thoughts down on paper and it can be very therapeutic.

3. My pushups are becoming better. I have never been very good at pushups and to be honest  still struggle with them but I tag some on at the end of my exercising and they are getting better. It will be interesting to see what happens in the coming weeks.

4. I feel much more awake earlier in the morning and the earlier start allows me to get more done throughout the day and at some stages during the last two or three weeks I have got everything I need to be done my lunchtime when in the past I would have procrastinated until night time.

5. It doesn't feel like I am wasting a day because I'm getting up with a purpose, it only seems logical to get other things done as well. So most of the time I am out the door before 7. I feel very productive.

6. All of this only takes exactly one hour. It's amazing. I start at 5am and the latest I have finished is 6.02am. It isn't a big chunk out of your day and you get off to an amazing start.

As with anything there is always the downside. Lets see what I have learned:

1. You get tired earlier in the evening. I'm finding that by 8pm I am almost ready for bed. I'm finding that I don't get much done at night time because I am just resting and getting ready for my sleeping time.

2. As with anything when you want to make a change, you are always going to experience resistance from those around you. You just have to think of the bigger picture and if those people care about you and your wellbeing then they will be on your side before long.

3. Your social life might suffer. I went on a date the other day and it didn't go very well as I was half asleep towards the end. I think the woman thought that I was bored of her.

I would recommend anyone out there to follow a Miracle Morning type of system. It could turn your life around. Who knows? You wont know until you try it.

RBL's progress

Have you ever seen the American comedy show Seinfeld? I must admit that I am not a great fan but there are a few episodes that stick out in my mind when I think of the show. The episode when they go to the Hamptons for the weekend or the episode where George Costanza tries to come up with the perfect comeback or the most famous of all arguably, The Soup Nazi.

As I said I am not a great fan of this show but I do know that basically the show is about nothing. A very amusing nothing but at the end of the day it is about nothing which is quite funny when you think about it. Anyway, I have up until this stage managed to post 35 times on this blog which is quite good if I do say so myself. I don't really have a theme as such so you could say that my blog is about nothing also. I'm sure as it develops that a theme will present itself. I am writing this for myself and I am told that is what you are supposed to do with blogs.

I am not even 10% into my goal but I have learned some things. What are they? Have a look below:

1. It takes a while to create a habit.

We all know that to create a habit it takes three weeks or so and in some cases it takes longer. This is certainly become a habit for me and yesterday when I was looking at my calendar for next week I was looking at times when I can do these blog posts. (Just so that you know, there are going to be a few early mornings this week.)

2. You don't have to write a novel for every post.

You don't have to write a novel for every post. As long as you a get out what you are trying to say then does it have to be 3000 words? Not at all. You can say what you want in 100 words.

3. The more you practice, the better you get.

One of my regular readers said to me in a private message that my writing is getting better and to that person I say thank you. I suppose like anything in life the more you do something the better you get at it.

4. It is really difficult to think of topics. 

This is really difficult. If you read my post a couple of days ago you would have seen that it took me nearly four hours to write something. It was ridiculous. I got complete writer's block. It is difficult to come up with something everyday but that is part of the challenge and I suppose it really stretches your brain. By the way, if there is anything you would like me to blog about please comment below. I would be happy to look at your request.

5. Habits help other parts of your life.

I've found that by creating this habit, I am also creating other habits which is pretty cool. I have to create time for this and then I start creating time for other things as well. Regular readers will know that I am following the Miracle Morning system from the book of the same name which is quite interesting. It means having to go to bed early which is OK unless you can't sleep. That makes things quite difficult.

There you have it. The Daily RBL is up and running and I look forward to the next 35 posts. I'm sure that there will be some posts that will be difficult and others that will be done in 10 minutes. That's daily blogging I suppose. I encourage you all to give it a go. You might learn a thing or two.