Saturday, 9 November 2019

A speech of mine at Toastmasters

Here is a speech I gave at Toastmasters a few years ago. Toastmasters is a great resource for building your confidence and I would recommend it for anyone:


(Silence for 30 seconds)

I read a book recently. It was called Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking. 

It was the second time I had read it and this time like a movie where you miss out on all the subtle hints that director was trying to show you in the first, the second time I got a lot more out of it. 

Before I go on, let me just tell you what I think an introvert and extrovert are. Basically my interpretation of the book.

Introvert – This is someone who is stimulated by being alone, being in solitude. Maybe they are reading a book, maybe they are sitting watching television, they are happy and contented by sitting at home doing nothing.

An extrovert on the other hand is stimulated by social encounters. They have to be out and about, at the latest parties. For those of you that use Facebook, you can identify these people who have posted 95 photos of the party they had at their apartment last Tuesday night, going like this …

Before I continue I would like to clarify about the difference between shyness and introversion. Shyness is fear of social judgment while introversion as I said is how you respond to stimulation.  

After reading the book and having extensive discussions with my friend I have come to the conclusion that I am an introvert. I don't want to make this sound like an AA meeting. Hello, I’m Blair and I’m an introvert however in today’s society it is almost considered a bad thing and the author of the book basically wrote it to say that it isn’t a bad thing. It isn’t a disease. 

We are up against a world that is set up for extroverts though. Work spaces that are set up for teams, and children who want to be by themselves seen as problems. 

Why I am here today is to tell you people who identify yourself as introverts that you are not alone and you don't have to feel bad or feel pressured that you want to stay at home on a Friday night while your extroverted friends are all fired up on red bulls and calling you anti-social for doing something that comes naturally to you. 

We have all had this I am sure. In fact one of my friends and I use that term very loosely used to make me feel like I was scum of the earth if I didn't come out and join him for a beer or twelve. When he would call he would ask, “What are you doing?” I would answer “nothing.” To him nothing meant that I wasn't doing anything so I should be out with a drink with him. I was busy doing nothing. Anyway, I no longer talk to that guy for other reasons. I discovered that he was a real user and would only contact me when he needed something. 

Now, lets get onto the part where you should embrace your role as an introvert. Introverts make great leaders. Why? Because they let the extroverts go. They let them crank up that creative storm that’s brewing in their heads and let them go crazy. The introverts are the stable people in the background pulling the strings. You put an extrovert in charge and they will want to ram their ideas down your throat. 

Remember as an introvert you are not alone. FDR’s wife Eleanor was an introvert. Dr. Seuss was an introvert. He used to hide himself in his house because he feared that children would be expecting him to be like his characters. Steve Jobs wouldn’t have the image he has now without Steve Wozniack.

Al Gore is an introvert. They say with introverts that if you send them off into a room full of people that they will come back with less energy than when they went in. Mr. Gore apparently needed a rest after those kinds of events like I will at the end of this speech. 

We know Mr. Gore for his movie, An inconvenient truth. He was very passionate about the subject but no one would listen to him. He basically had to make that movie because a bunch of extroverted congressman are not get be stimulated by a tiny crack in the ice. They need a super duper Hollywood extravaganza to grab their attention. 

Why do we make introverts feel so guilty about wanting to go off somewhere by themselves?

Western societies have always favoured the man of action instead of the man of contemplation. 

Despite all of this nonsense, I say embrace your introvertedness. I say if you want to stay at home and read a book or watch television on a Saturday night, don't feel embarrassed about it. In fact I remember one of the best nights was sitting at home with a good friend drinking a few beers watching sport. It was fantastic.

I say if someone tries to steamroll over you with fast words and gibberish, just let them go for it, they will be found it soon enough.

Being an introvert doesn't make you gay, as some people have thought about me in the past. It doesn’t make you snobby, as some people have told me in the past that they thought I was, it makes you who you are. So feel proud about who you are and what you do. Don't feel that you have to run around yahooing everywhere. It’s not you and it will make you tired and make you look like someone you are not.