Wednesday 18 January 2017

A couple of bits of advice for shy guys

This post is going to be for guys and more specifically, single, shy guys. If you are not a single, shy guy then maybe you might not get much out of this post but then again you might learn something so who knows?

First of all, regular readers will know this already but for new readers to this blog I will go over the difference between introvert and shy. Some people think it is the same thing but that can't be further from the truth.

INTROVERT

An introvert is someone who reenergises by being alone or maybe with a close friend or partner. They don't really like parties and social events as they find that their energy depletes quite rapidly.

SHYNESS

This is basically the fear of being judged negatively in a social situation.

Shyness and introversion are not synonymous as there is such a thing as a shy extrovert. Someone who wants to go to the party but doesn't want to be the middle of attention.

Today I am going to talk to the guys who maybe want to go to the party or date women but you are too shy (scared) to do anything about it. Maybe you are like the guy below.



I will give you two ideas that you might want to use in the coming weeks.


1. ONLINE DATING

Online dating doesn't have the same stigma that it had 20 years ago. Today, people are so busy that their love life is put on the back burner and they look to the internet to help them. There are many apps out there that can help you as well as well established websites that can help you.

 Go in with the attitude that you are using these sites to overcome your shyness. Don't feel bad about it and don't give up if you don't find the love of your life in the first two dates. Think about it as a social experiment for yourself and think about it as a self development exercise, then you won't feel too much pressure. Also realise that you are going to stuff up the first few dates and you are not going to be attracted to everyone and that goes for the women as well.

Not all women are going to be attracted to you. That is just life. They might be judging you which I know you fear but think about. You are probably never going to see them again and if you do you might not even recognise them. Give it a go. At worse you are going to overcome your shyness and at best you are going to find the love of your life. Not bad if I do say so myself.


2. ORGANISED PARTIES

Any many cities there are people organising parties. They might be using websites like Meetup.com and others. This might be more difficult than an online date because you are going to an event with a lot more people but remember that people there are not really judging you because they are there to meet people too so they should up to talking and being friendly because if they are not why are they there? It wouldn't make sense.

After going to these parties, who knows? You might get invites to other things from people at these parties and before you know it, your shyness has gone and your old friends and family won't recognise you.


You don't have to be shy all your life. You can get out and about if you really want to. As the quote says below, if you really want something, you will find a way and you will overcome the obstacles to get there and be successful.

"Wanting something is not enough. You must hunger for it. Your motivation must be absolutely compelling in order to overcome the obstacles that will invariably come your way." Les Brown.

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